


Keep Me in Your Heart Even if I Run

by 01blackcat02



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alpha/Omega, M/M, Omega Verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-06
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-29 15:50:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 30,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7690507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/01blackcat02/pseuds/01blackcat02
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes it's the things we are most afraid of that give us strength to move forward. Arthur lived with claustrophobia for as long as he could remember. The omega knows what he need to do went it strikes, but Alfred is left stumbling in the dark hoping that the next move he makes is the right one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> After writing a scene for "Our Cure" I decided it didn't really work in that story so instead, here is one fic I've been working on every now and again. Both this one and "Our Cure" was started around the same time and that might result in some similarities, but both stories are not related and deal with different issue/conflicts. 
> 
> I'd like to thank usuk-omegaverse on tumblr for answering my ask a long while back!
> 
> This story is mostly completed (that's why I'm posting 3 chapters right away)^^ Hope you all enjoy it!

Arthur's heart pounder in his ears as he tried to push through a crowded hallway. Bodies pressed up all around him, trapping him, and for a moment the omega almost gave up into the feeling. With the last desperate push he made it to the doors and practically ran outside.

The immediate relief flooded his senses and he breathed in deep, steady breaths.

A large open field separated the busy commons building from his dorm. Behind him the doors opened and a group of students walked past him, their loud chatter with too potent mixed pheromones overwhelmed Arthur, trapping him in another moment of panic.

Arthur closed his eyes and gripped his book bag, his whole body going rigid until finally the group walked further away, their voices echoing in the distance.

Opening his eyes Arthur looked around the empty field before hurrying off across it to his building.

* * *

 "I'm telling you, that omega is really skittish." Gilbert said though a mouthful of fries. The bits spilled out of his mouth and fell onto the table."I get it that omegas are sensitive and all but this is ridiculous."

Alfred furrowed his brows in displeasure, eyeing Gilbert who was stuffing his face with more fries despite already having a mouthful.

"So he's a little nervous, I wouldn't call him completely undateable." Alfred countered defensively.

The American alpha looked to his left longingly at the cute omega in question, who was sitting further back by a window away from the main seating area. The commons building was full of activity and the loud hum of chatter filled the space as everyone tried to get their quick lunch before the next class.

"Did you finally grow a pair and talked to him?" Gilbert's mocking voice send a spark of irritation through Alfred.

The American alpha turned and glared at the laughing albino. A moment later the older alpha's face turned red as he choked on his fries.

Watching Gilbert cough and frantically pound on his chest with his hands brought an amused smirk to the American's face, but he did push his glass of coke towards the other alpha.

Grabbing the offered glass Gilbert gulped down the soda and after some more coughing he finally regaining his breath.

Seeing that his roommate wasn't going to choke Alfred looked back at Arthur longingly.

"I tried approaching him a few weeks ago, but he looked so uncomfortable being around me." Alfred turned back and rubbed his face with his hands in frustration. "When I tried to relax him, you know with the neck thing he just looked so mortified and actually ran. I'm really too scared to talk with him again." Alfred sighed and slouched in his chair pouting.

A second round of laughter had the American kicking the albino under the table. "Not funny Gilly."

"I thought it was pathetic." He leaned to the side to look at the British omega who was fiddling with his books while trying to eat a sandwich. "Alright, if you really want to get with that one the awesome me decided to do you a solid and set you two losers up."

Alfred perked up ignoring the insult. "Really?! How?"

"Well," Gilbert licked his salty fingers off one by one in faux contemplation. "Franny has known Arthur since childhood, you know, and since he does owe me one, I think we can make some arrangements." The alpha wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Alfred leaned up more excited with the prospect of this opportunity. "What do you have in mind?"

"Well I think, my friend, we are way overdue for a party." Gilbert grinned and leaned in. "Francis will find a way to get Arthur to come and you will finally become a man. Ow! Is this how you thank the awesome me?" Gilbert leaned down to rub his injured shin.

"Quit making those stupid faces, especially about Arthur." Alfred growled.

"Jeez, you literally had one conversation and already you're growing territorial. Relax no one's going to steal your precious Artie." The albino pouted still rubbing his aching shin.

The two alphas quieted down as the omega in question dashed past them frown set deep and eyes glaring as he pushed through the crowd.

"Especially with that attitude."

* * *

 


	2. Chapter 2

"No."

"Oh, come on it's just one party." Francis groaned again and Arthur really wanted to punch him for real this time.

"I don't want to go." He sat on the couch by the window irritably flipping through the channels on his TV.

"Arthur, it's been two years at college and you still haven't experienced a frat house party."

Stopping on a cooking channel Arthur glared at Francis. "That's the one experience I don't need to have."

Going back to channel surfing Arthur involuntary stopped on a commercial for the omegas’ post heat products.

"Alfred will be there. I thought you like that alpha?" Francis bribed with his thump card this time.

Arthur's face turned red and he pointedly ignored the Frenchman across from him and continued to click through the channels. But the alpha's name did hit a spot of affection in the omega that refused to leave him.

"You might finally get to talk with him." Francis' sweet voice lingered in Arthur's brain conjuring up images of the American alpha.

"Right, because last time that went so great." Arthur sarcastically responded.

Francis sighed in frustration. "He doesn't know."

"And you can't tell him!" Arthur turned to glare at the alpha. Then his angry frown turned sad and he turned the TV off. "It's horrible. What if he rejects me?" The omega said meekly.

Francis stood up and walked to Arthur crouching just in front of the omega. "Oh Arthur, you know he won't do such a cruel thing. But you won't truly know until you actually talk with him." He reached out and held Arthur's hand. "Just come to the party. I'll make sure you'll be fine. Alright?"

After a moment of hesitation the omega considered his options. Go to the party and potentially have a real chance with the American or stay at home and let another opportunity fly by.

"Alright, but if I say I want to leave I will."

Francis' grip tightened as the alpha grinned with delight.

"Don't worry Arthur, everything will be just fine."


	3. Chapter 3

"Man…I thought you said he's coming…" Alfred whined not for the first time.

Gilbert rolled his eyes and knocked down a beer before pushing another one towards the American.

"And he will be. Franny said so."

Alfred groaned and opened the offered beer.

The party attracted a lot of people including other sororities and fraternities. The place was packed and although normally Alfred would be the first among the dancers or beer pong competition this time he impatiently waited for a certain British omega to arrive.

His second drink turned into a third and a fourth, before he lost track and got swept away with the crowd.

Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew he should be looking for something but a pretty omega in his arms was dancing invitingly against him and for the life of him, Alfred just couldn't remember what was the problem.

* * *

This was exactly everything Arthur heard of these parties and detested.

They were two hours late because Arthur last minute decided not to go and Francis once again had to try and convince the omega otherwise. Finally they arrived at the house and the party was in full swing topped with loud music and someone’s house TPed next door.

Arthur frowned and wrapped his arms around himself. Everything in his body screaming at him to turn back and run, but before Arthur could follow through with this instinct Francis was pushing him into the house and Arthur completely froze.

The crowd pressed around him, air thick with heat from warm bodies and sour with alcohol. Loud music assaulted his ears drowning Francis' voice out. Arthur almost toppled over as someone pushed into him, but Francis' gripped his arm and pushed the omega forward.

They reached a wall by a window and Francis pushed Arthur against it. Grabbing a beer from a random passerby he showed the cold can into the omega's hands.

Leaning down he yelled in Arthur's ear over the music. "Wait here, I'll go find Alfred. Okay?"

Arthur could only nod, his heart racing as his fingers shook around the can. Francis disappeared into the crowd and Arthur choked on a whimper.

A couple rushed by him and Arthur pressed against the wall so they wouldn't touch him. His eyes darted from face to face, pupils fully dilated in fear, his breathing short.

He turned and pressed his forehead against a glass window closing his eyes.

The world swirled around him in wild confusion of sound, scent, and the suffocating pressure of feeling trapped. Arthur tried to steady his racing heart by focusing on his breathing and he prayed that Francis would return soon so they could leave. He knew this was a terrible idea. He fucking knew it.

Tears streamed down his face as he breathed through his mouth, choking on hot air in the crowded building. A hand suddenly grabbed his shoulder pushing him back against the wall to face the person.

Expecting Francis Arthur opened his eyes, but the face he saw was unfamiliar.

The stranger leered down at him body wobbling his smile loopy. The strange alpha must have said something since the stench of alcohol hit Arthur face and he felt like throwing up.

Frowning the alpha leaned in trapping the omega with his larger built.

Panicking, Arthur did the only thing he could to keep the distance from the stranger and pushed the man with all his strength.

The alpha collided with the people behind him falling to the ground. Curses flew above the loud thump of music and droplets of spilled beer hit Arthur in the face. The alpha's angry green eyes jolted the fear in Arthur and he did the one thing he knew.

He ran.

Arthur didn't know where he was going, but the need to get out forced him to push through the crowd ignoring the angry shouts around him.

The crowd tightened and pushed the omega into people around him, refusing to let him pass. In the frantic motion of the dancers Arthur tripped colliding into someone. His throat closed and Arthur couldn't breath. He was trapped once again in the confined space. With nothing left to do Arthur sank down among the shuffling feet and cried.

* * *

 Maybe it was the sudden rush of emotions that Alfred gets when he sees Arthur or perhaps the unmistakable scent of fear that jolted the American close to sober.

He was dancing with an omega from earlier who was rubbing against him. Thoughts of taking him upstairs crossed Alfred's mind but this omega, although pretty, didn't have the green eyes he fantasized about or that cute pout.

So when the omega who did have those featured bumped into him Alfred got excited, ready to sweep him into a dance. However, seeing Arthur collapse drenched in fear scent spun his drunken mind into action.

Letting go of his dance partner Alfred kneeled beside Arthur pulling him into a hug.

The omega weakly protested the embrace his fear scent increasingly gaining the attention of those near by.

The crowd slowly pushed back giving them space. A shout of Alfred's name got the alpha to look up to see Antonio pushing through. Looking at Alfred he yelled over the music.

"Oh you found him! I was afraid he got trampled!" The Spaniard wobbled, unsteady on his feet and out of breath.  

When the alpha tried to move closer Alfred growled surprising not only Antonio but himself.

His grip tightened around the omega gripping the back of the smaller man's neck on instinct, but Arthur was not calming down like omegas usually did. Instead he kept trying to break free.

Alfred frowned not understanding and squeezed tighter his nails digging into Arthur's skin.

"Alfred get him out of here!"

Somewhere in the crowd Alfred thought he heard Francis. The idea settled in his fuzzy mind and ignoring the concerned questions of those around them Alfred hoisted the squirming omega against him and pushed through the house.

* * *

 Arthur was in his own personal hell.

Everything was crashing down on him pressing and cornering until there was no place to run to. No room for him to breath.

Whoever was holding him wasn't letting him go and Arthur couldn't quite get enough air into his lungs.

The stench of alcohol mixed with sweat nauseated him further and the musky overbearing scent of the alpha send mixed signals into his instincts. One to push closer into the scent, and the other to break free and run.

Not able to do anything against the strong hold and the bruising grip against his neck, Arthur gave in and full out cried weakly pushing against his restraints every now and again.

A burst of cold air hit his face shocking the omega.

The arms around him shifted hoisting him up further so that he was carried instead of pressed against and dragged.

"Put me down." Arthur choked out once he could get more cold air into his lungs.

"No, we need to get you home." An out of breath voice replied.

Arthur squirmed against the hold. "No! Please put me down! Please!"

Frustration welled up in him ready to deck the alpha in the head if that what it took.

"Alright, stop. Okay, okay. Stop kicking or I'll drop you."

Arthur felt the ground beneath his feet and slowly he allowed to be guided down to sit.

The ground was cold beneath him but it was stable and solid. Curling in Arthur put his head on his knees, hands weakly wrapped around his shivering body. He stayed silent, breathing in deeply the cold air and occasionally choking back a hiccup.

Distantly Arthur heard the alpha sit next to him. He saw a hand reach out presumably for his neck.

Arthur tensed. "Don't!"

Hesitantly it retracted and Arthur relaxed again.

* * *

 Alfred was at a loss.  

Omegas should be comforted by tightly hugging them. Gripping the back of the neck would instantly relax them. But Arthur wasn't reacting to these in a positive way. Instead he seems to get even more frightened.

Not knowing what else to do Alfred settled next to the omega determined to wait, whatever this was, out.

The frat house was a distance away, but the muffled noise from the music echoed in the night air.

His throat was parched from all the beer he drank. Alfred considered eating the light layer of snow on the ground but decides against it.

It wasn't until he heart Arthur's teeth chattering that Alfred tried to speak to the omega.

"Hey, Artie." Hesitantly reaching out again, Alfred lightly touched the omega's shoulder.

Arthur flinched but didn't push away. Instead he raised his head to look at the alpha, his eyes red.

"You're freezing. Let get going, okay?"

After a brief moment Arthur nodded.

Without protest he allowed Alfred to help him up and although he tensed when Alfred wrapped an arm around the shorter man's torso the omega didn't say anything or pull away.

They made the long trek back to Arthur’s dorm in silence.

 


	4. Chapter 4

"So.... you're claustrophobic."  Alfred hummed processing the new information.

"Yes, okay." Arthur fidgeted with the sleeves of his sweater. "I get really uncomfortable in crowded and tight places." 

"Hmmm." Alfred looked over the flustered omega while drinking his coke. 

Arthur wasn't looking at him, instead he continued to pull at the strings of his sweater. His cheeks dusted in red, extending to the omega's ears and down his neck.

"Ok. Will you still go out with me?" Alfred asked and tried not to laugh at Arthur's wide shocked eyes that darted up to stare at him.

"You don't mind?" Those wide hopeful eyes looked down again and Alfred put his drink on the table with a smile on his face. 

"No."

Arthur frowned. "I'm not exactly normal." He visibly got angry and glared at Alfred. "I don't like cuddling, or going to parties and other crowded places. I also don't like to be manhandled and -"

"Okay, okay." Alfred put out his hands in surrender. "No excessive touching. Got it." 

Arthur looked away and Alfred wanted to smack himself. An awkward silence stretched between them, Arthur's irritated scent mixed with anger and disappointment souring the air between them. 

Alfred scrunched his nose.

"How about this. Go out with me, and we can figure out all those details as they come." 

Arthur looked back at him and Alfred grinned as the omega's scent changed to curious and hopeful. Anything was better than that sour smell from before. "If you don't like something, you just let me know and I'll stop. Okay?"

Arthur looked away eyes darting around as if looking for some argument or a reason to reject the alpha. Apparently finding none, Arthur looked back at Alfred his face still covered in a red blush. 

He allowed a small smile before replying. "Okay.

Alfred cheered inside. "Good." He reached out and grabbed Arthur's hand. Gently rubbing his thumb against Arthur's soft skin the alpha grinned. "Is this okay?" 

Arthur snorted and intertwined their fingers. "Yes."


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is becoming way longer than I expected it to be....

Alfred learned fairly quickly that Arthur was not like the previous omegas he dated.

The overconfidence and dominance that had his previous partners instantly charmed seem to frighten Arthur.

Especially if they were out in public.

When Alfred had his arm around Arthur holding him tightly, the omega tried to pull away. Although Arthur tried to do it slowly, as if to try and not bring attention to how uncomfortable he felt. Alfred still noticed though.

It was kinda hard not to.

The first time Alfred leaned in to kiss Arthur, he accidentally out of habit grasped the back of the omega’s neck. Arthur immediately pressed his hands against his chest and started to push away, eyes darting in search of an escape.

After that Alfred constantly checked himself where he touched Arthur.

On their first date at the movies, Alfred did the classical arm-over-shoulder thing. Arthur tensed, but seemed to calm down and relax into the hold. However, when Alfred leaned in and gently bit the omega’s neck in a playful tease, Arthur ran out of the theater stumbling over people in his way.

So no, it wasn't the typical alpha/omega courtship that Alfred was used to.

But Alfred was nothing if not resilient.

He quickly picked up that grasping Arthur's neck would just sent the poor omega into a panic attack. Instead, Alfred learned that gently running his fingers over the omega’s neck did the same trick of calming him.

Wrapping Arthur in a full out bear hug was a recipe for disaster. No draping his larger alpha body over the smaller omega either.

Alfred learned through trial and error how to hold Arthur so that his boyfriend wouldn’t feel trapped. How to position his larger body against Arthur, that made the omega feel safe and wanted while satisfying Alfred's own desire for close contact.

The initial period of their relationship was an awkward time filled with missteps.

The biggest issue was concerning the most intimate part of their relationship.

They were a month and a half into their courtship when the topic of sex came up.

Because Alfred and Arthur were still human and had urges that needed to be fulfilled, but their current predicament left both with uncertainty of how exactly to approach this new level of intimacy.

* * *

 “Can you put those in the fridge? Thanks!” Arthur rushed past Alfred through the dorm to his room.

He was panting and flushed, his cock half hard in his pants. Arthur sat on the bed and fanned his face, willing his erection away.

“Artie?”

Alfred's voice startled him.

“I'll be out in a moment!” He called back, his erection was not going away.

Earlier the pair drove into town to get real groceries. Arthur's roommate, Rebecca, was away for the weekend visiting her boyfriend at another university, so Arthur had the whole flat to himself.

Of course Alfred jumped on the opportunity for some time alone, and Arthur didn’t protest the idea.

Initially.

But now, knowing how intimate and intense this was going to be, the omega was feeling on edge.

It wasn't Alfred fault that the alpha craved more intimacy than Arthur could give, and it wasn't like Arthur was completely again it. He just needed to be eased into it. Not molested in Alfred's car just because Alfred was feeding off his pheromones.

The alpha knocked on the door and when Arthur didn't call out, he slowly opened it and stepped inside.

“Arthur?”

The omega hugged himself, but didn't turn around.

Alfred blew out a frustrated breath. He slowly walked towards his boyfriend staying within Arthur's eye sight so that the omega could see him.

“I'm sorry Artie,” the alpha started and sat beside the omega. “I didn't mean to jump you like that.” He raise his hand and gently rubbed Arthur’s neck with his knuckles.

Arthur took deep breaths to steady his racing heart and craned his neck for Alfred, humming in approval.

“It's ok, you just surprised me back there.” He looked at Alfred's concerned face. “I just wasn't ready, I guess.”

Making out in a car was pretty typical of couples, but Arthur panicked. One moment they were parking in the student garage discussing what they should cook and the next Alfred pinned him in his seat, his large frame suffocating Arthur.

Alfred frowned. “Still...I should have known better.” The alpha groaned in frustration and fell back on the bed covering his eyes with his arm.

“It's just...Sometimes it's so hard for me to control myself. You smell so good. I can't stand not touching you or pinning you down, or smothering you with my scent. It drives me crazy.”

Alfred uncovered his eyes and looked at Arthur, who turned and was looking down at him.

Alfred reached out and brushed his fingers over Arthur's check.

“But I hate seeing you scared more than anything else.”

Arthur grabbed the alpha’s hand and nuzzled into the palm. He kissed Alfred’s fingers affectionately one by one.

“You said so yourself, we can figure it out as we go along.” The omega smiled and stood up pulling on Alfred's hand. “Now come on. Let's go make dinner.”

* * *

Arthur couldn't really cook.

That was one of the things they discovered the first time they spend time together at each other's dorms.

Alfred was surprisingly okay with that.

So while the alpha cooked their meal, Arthur chopped the ingredients and washed the dishes.

They settled themselves on the couch, plates in hand while some action movie was playing on the TV.

Arthur sat closest to the window legs folded under him chewing on his food, eyes glued to the screen. On the outside he seem fine, but inside his mind Arthur's thoughts ran through all the different scenarios of things going wrong.

Alfred was sitting beside him, slightly away not touching the omega. And although the alpha picked up on Arthur’s unease, he didn't reach out for the other boy.

Whatever Arthur was mulling over, Alfred was determined to follow the omega's lead whenever he was ready.

When the movie was finally over and the plates empty, Arthur couldn't stop his fidgeting. The alphas weren’t the only one affected by omegas’ pheromones. It went both ways and those same pheromones pulled the omegas to their alphas. Arthur was no different and he craved Alfred just as much as the older boy craved him.

Taking a calming breath, Arthur slowly leaned in and cautiously nuzzled into Alfred's neck. He darted his tongue out, tasting the alpha’s skin and groaned in pleasure.

Grasping the front of Alfred's shirt, Arthur pulled himself onto the alpha’s lap, all the while sucking on his boyfriend's neck.

Alfred leaned back, allowing Arthur to set the pace. His right hand came up and rubbed the omega's side, back and forth, before slipping under the sweater to rub at the warm flesh of his belly.

Arthur pulled away from the now bruised neck, eyes closed in lust. He was so horny. The alpha's scent pulling him into his urges making him want to completely submit.

“Arthur…” Alfred moaned, bringing his other hand to Arthur's face rubbing his cheek. “Let's go to your room.”

Arthur nodded and got up hurriedly walking to his bedroom with the alpha following close behind.

The omega stopped at the bed and looked at Alfred, who was pulling off his shirt followed closely by his jeans.

Arthur swallowed his nerves and started to discard his own clothing. The sweater came off easily but his hands trembled at the button of his pants. He growled in frustration ready to tear the damn thing off, when Alfred's hands grasped his and easily undid them.

Arthur looked up at Alfred.

The alpha's eyes were dark. He looked straight at Arthur as he pulled the pants down with the underwear leaving the omega in nothing but his socks.

“Make yourself comfortable on the bed, Artie.” Alfred's voice was hoarse and deep that had Arthur instantly scrambling onto the mattress.

He sat on his knees in the center and watched as Alfred slowly crawled onto the bed reaching out for Arthur's neck.

The omega tensed, but when Alfred gently ran his fingers over his skin, Arthur relaxed.

He could do this.

He leaned forward and caught Alfred's lips in a slow kiss.

Feeling Arthur melt against him, Alfred licked his tongue past the omega's lips and into his mouth.

This was familiar territory, they've done this enough times for Alfred to know when to pull back so that Arthur could take a deep breath. Where to put his hands to hold the other boy and not trap him. To gently rub his stomach, which had the same calming effect as the neck.

This was all good. Controlled. Familiar.

Then Arthur moaned into his mouth and arched back. The omega’s smaller cock rubbed against his own and Alfred suddenly smelled it.

The slick that poured out from Arthur’s hole.

It's wasn't heat slick, just the small amount of natural lubrication that all omegas produced once aroused.

Alfred smelled it before with others, but nothing could have prepared him for Arthur's intense scent.

Alfred growled and toppled them over, pinning the omega down as his hand reached lower and sank into the wetness.

Distantly Alfred heard the whines of protest and Arthur pushing against him, but Alfred's brain wasn't fully functioning right now.

The alpha growled and bit into the omega's neck using his full weight to press the smaller male beneath him into the bed.

Alfred’s fingers worked deep inside the omega to ready him faster for his cock. He lapped at the blood in his mouth and felt his cock grow, already leaking precum.

Then the full force of Arthur's fear scent hit him just seconds before the omega kneed him in the gut.

Letting go of his bite from the shock of the impact, Alfred was pushed backwards as Arthur darted away, his sock clad feet slippery on the plush carpet.

It took another few minutes before Alfred regained his wits and got up to go after Arthur.

His stomach dropped in agony at seeing Arthur stand by the window rocking back and forth.

“Artie…” Alfred quietly said to not startle the omega further.

He cringed when the omega flinched and pressed his head into the cold glass.

“Arthur, I'm so sorry.” Alfred started reaching for Arthur, but the omega jerked away stumbling over his shaking feel.

“Don't touch me!” Arthur had his arms stretched out in front of him to keep the alpha away.

The apartment soon filled with Arthur's sour scent that triggered Alfred to go after the omega and physically calm him.

But Alfred’s proximity was the last thing Arthur wanted. His flight instincts took over and Arthur ran to the bathroom locking himself inside.

He crouched down against the door and cried.

Alfred's worried voice called to him from the other side of the door.

For a moment Arthur just sat breathing with his eyes closed feeling his heartbeat pounding in his chest.

Then Arthur opened his eyes and found himself in the darkness of the bathroom, completely enclosed. Panic set in and Arthur felt he couldn’t breath at all. The short gasps of breath he managed to take sent his heart beating even faster. His eyes darting from one shadowed wall to another. The fear pushed his body against the door as if Arthur could melt through it.

His hand reached out grabbing the door handle, but it wouldn’t turn and Arthur didn't remember just how exactly locks worked.

“Al...Alfred….please…” He whimpered clawing at the door with his fingernails.

“Artie, shhh, it'll be alright. I'm here.” Alfred’s voice felt too far away on the other side of the door.

Arthur felt the dark walls close even tighter around him and the omega couldn’t hand it anymore. He full out cried hysterically.

Somewhere between uncontrollable sobbing and pounding of his heart in his ears, Arthur could pick out Alfred’s panicked voice.

“Arthur! Arthur listen to me. You just have to breath okay? Just do that for me alright?” Alfred told himself that no matter what he couldn’t lose it while Arthur was like this.

Arthur hiccuped and tried to follow the alpha’s command.

“O-okay…”

Arthur wiped his eyes with his hands inhaling loudly with his mouth.

“That’s it Artie, just breath through your mouth. I’m gonna count to ten and you’re going to breath with me okay?”

Arthur opened his eyes to the darkness and new tears welled up in his eyes.  
  
“Okay…”

It felt like an eternity to Alfred sitting there helplessly by the locked door counting to ten so that Arthur could breath. The small whimpers the omega choked out were breaking his heart, but finally somehow Arthur calmed down enough to stop hyperventilating.

“Arthur. I need you to unlock the door now. Okay?”

Another small eternity and then.  
  
“Okay.”

And Arthur was standing before his face drenched in tears still in nothing but his socks on.

Alfred could cry in relief.

He wanted to wrap his arms around the omega and smother him in kisses, but instead with shaking hands Alfred gently grabbed Arthur’s hand and led the omega to his bedroom.

“Lie down.” The alpha let go of Arthur and went to open the window.

The cold night air brushed over the omega’s naked skin. It was early spring and the nights were still cold, but right now the brisk night air was doing wonders for the overstimulated omega.

Alfred kneeled by the bed, gently stroking Arthur’s face.

“Everything is fine now Arthur. You’re safe. I’m so proud of you darling.” Alfred whispered into the space between them.

“I’m so sorry I frightened you.” The alpha continued in a whisper, looking lost and unsure. “Did you want me to go?”

Arthur sat up hands reaching out for Alfred. “No, no! Stay. Please. Sorry. I don’t...Um...I mean…”

The omega was trying to formulate words but the episode left his brain in shambles.

“Okay. I’ll stay.”

Alfred stood up unsure for a moment, then climbed into the bed on the other side of Arthur, keeping the omega by the window. He pulled up the blankets over them.

“Umm...I guess you don’t want me to drape over you. Right?” Alfred awkwardly asked.

Arthur shook his head, but then he raised his hand and pressed against Alfred’s chest pushing the Alpha down onto the bed. The omega wordlessly and carefully pressed against the alpha nuzzling into the older boy’s chest.

Alfred pulled the covers further over them and hesitantly placed his hand on Arthur’s lower back, rubbing his palm in small circles. The alpha exhaled in equal part relief and frustration.

“I was so close to just breaking down that door to get you out.” Alfred whispered into the night.

Arthur was still crying. Alfred could feel the wet droplets on his chest.

“I’m glad you didn’t.” Arthur murmured between hiccups. Then he quietly laughed through his tears. “Rebecca would have thrown a fit.” He went quiet and reached for Alfred’s hand intertwining their fingers.

“I forgot to buy a new lightbulb for the nightlight in the bathroom.” He whispered half asleep.

Alfred craned his head to kiss Arthur’s head. “We’ll pick one up tomorrow first thing.”

 


	6. Chapter 6

Spring rolled into summer, and before Alfred knew it, his birthday was right around the corner.

The alpha loved his birthday. Cake, presents, topped with fourth of July fireworks. Who wouldn't like that?

“Is Arthur coming?”

Ah yes, that what’s been causing his gloomy mood.

“I don't know, mom, he seemed uncertain last we talked.” Alfred leaned against the passenger window and watched the rush hour traffic.  

The elusive omega seem to avoid him these past couple of weeks. 

Sure they hung out maybe a handful of times over the break, but if Alfred had his way they would be inseparable. It also probably didn’t help that they lived a few towns apart.

However, Alfred did make it a point to stake his claim and to show Arthur that he was there for the long haul. The alpha met Arthur's parents who seemed to like him. Or at least, Arthur's mother certainly did. The omega’s father was a little hard to read, but Alfred thought he balanced his charm and with polite assertiveness that, hopefully, pleased the older alpha.

The omega in turn also met Alfred’s parents who, of course, instantly loved the British boy. 

It was a little weird spending time at each other's houses with their parents hovering about. At the university they could display as much PDA as Arthur allowed, but here the awkwardness of knowing that at anytime their parents could walk in on them had the couple cautious and jumpy.

Too cautious in Alfred’s opinion. 

That, probably, what motivated Alfred to organize a trip to the beach with some of their friends. A move that scored the alpha a nice snogging under the umbrella and later in the shallow water as Arthur, it turned out, loved the ocean but couldn't actually swim. 

Then it was two weeks before Alfred's birthday and he heard nothing from his boyfriend. 

It was so sudden that Alfred was at a loss as to what could have happened that made Arthur so distant. He played over and over the times they spend together. Did he not read Arthur’s body language correctly that made the omega feel unsafe? Was is something he unknowingly did or said? Or did Arthur’s father forbade his only omega child from seeing the alpha because he was American and not like those nice and proper British ones.

Alfred must have been emitting his depressing thoughts since his mother, Annabelle, flashed her moody son a sympathetic smile. 

“He’s probably just nervous. This will be the first official holiday you will be spending together.” 

“It's my birthday, mom.” Alfred grumbled. 

“That makes it even more intimidating.” Annabelle laughed when Alfred gave her an annoyed look.

“Trust me, Alfred, any celebrations or holidays that you spend together makes people realize that their relationship suddenly became that much more serious.” She pulled into the lot and parked the car. 

“Just give him a call and say how much you'd love to spend the day together.” She reached over and ruffled her son’s hair.

Alfred huffed pushing her hand away, but allowed a small smile. “Alright mom.”

“There's my boy!” She gushed. “Now come on! We have to buy all the party stuff before they're all sold out. I don't wanna fight the other omegas for the themed cups again.


	7. Chapter 7

Today was Alfred’s birthday. He was also having a party for the fourth of July. Alfred called him last week and asked if Arthur could be there. Nothing too big, just his family.

At first Arthur wasn’t sure.

It was, after all, a family event. but Alfred’s almost shy voice over the phone pulled on the omega’s heartstrings. After asking his father permission, Arthur secured the ‘go ahead’ from the family alpha.

Alfred was ecstatic and said Arthur could spend the night so that he didn't have to worry about driving home so late.

Arthur's father grumbled about this, but still allowed Arthur to go with strict instructions to call if the omega wanted to go home.

And still after all that, Arthur was terrified.

They haven't gone to a party since that frat house one back in spring. Arthur made it perfectly clear that those parties weren't his thing and he didn't feel comfortable there.

Alfred understood and since he didn't want to go without his boyfriend they skipped out on the majority of the social events at their university.

Gilbert was not pleased.

Now logically Arthur knew that Alfred’s birthday party wasn't going to get crazy. Right? The omega has been to the Jones household enough times to familiarize himself with the place and Alfred’s parents were great.

So what was making him so anxious?

* * *

 “Artie! You made it!”

Alfred pulled his boyfriend into a tight hug upon opening the door.

Arthur tensed in Alfred's arms, but willed himself not to pull away. Instead he gently wrapped his arms around the alpha and said. “Alfred, you're squishing me and your gift.”

“Ah, sorry sweetie.” Pulling away but not letting the Brit go, Alfred leaned in for a chaste kiss. “I'm just super happy to see you.” The alpha said once he was satisfied with the sweet kiss. “Now come on, I wanna introduce you the rest of the family.”

Arthur was pulled into the large house, through the hallway and past the kitchen. He only had a moment to hastily wave at Annabelle, who was taking a pie out of the oven, before Arthur was presented to Alfred's family.

This is what Arthur feared from the time his older brother Allister introduced his mate, Leslie, to his family.

The large living room was packed with mated alphas, omegas, and betas their numerous children running around, narrowly avoiding the furniture. The whole house was bustling with people talking loudly and laughing with each other. The closest few adults just barely acknowledged the two and some gave a short, friendly wave.

Alfred could just make out Alfred’s father, Lee Jones, grilling on the porch while drinking a beer and talking with a woman who was pouring cups of juice for small children.

“So most of these people are my aunts and uncles with their mates. That there is uncle Charles he makes the best crab cakes.” Alfred pointed at a bearded man by the TV.

“And that over there is aunt Francine, she's really into knitting and will use any excuse to gift socks and sweaters.” He pointed at another relative who was examining a loosely knitted top that one of the kids was wearing.

“That tall woman in red there is Joyce and her beta mate Rachelle. They live in San Diego and grandma hates that they still haven't officially tied the knot or whatever. But they have the coolest place overlooking the ocean.”

Arthur craned his neck to see the couple chatting with another group of adults.

“So...all these people related to you?” Arthur asked and hoped that his voice came out more steady than he felt.

“Yep!” Alfred grinned. “We tend to spread all over. I even have a cousin from Canada here somewhere, but we all try to get together for the fourth and my birthday like a yearly reunion of sorts.” Alfred scanned the room and grabbed Arthur's hand once he spotted who he was looking for.

Arthur tried not to freak out and collect himself mentally, but once he was standing in front of the old seated omega he couldn't stop his hands from shaking.

“Grandma!” Alfred let go of his boyfriend to hug his elder.

“There you are. Our birthday boy!” She patted Alfred on the cheek and turned her sharp eyes on Arthur. “And is this the omega that will give me more grandchildren to spoil.” She teasingly asked, but her eyes moved sharply up and down to take the British omega in like a piece of meat on the butcher's table.

Arthur simultaneously turned red and wanted to cry.

He extended his shaking hand to the eldest omega. “Pleasure to meet you ma’am, I'm Arthur.”

Eyeing the hand she reached and grasped it lightly, her bony fingers cool in his sweaty hand.

“A little on the small size, aren’t you. What are you eating boy?” She turned to her grandson. “Alfred make sure you feed the poor thing. How is he going to carry children on that scrawny frame?”

Arthur instantly froze, eyes wide.

“Aha, grandma. Isn’t it a little too early for that kinda talk?” Alfred nervously eyed Arthur. “Besides, Arthur still has two years left at uni. So we’re in no rush.” Alfred laughed good-naturedly, but Arthur caught the sharp look the older omega sent him.

She was exactly like his own grandmother. Poor Leslie was sent crying to the bathroom after that first meeting with the bitter woman, but of course all was forgiven once they had their first child.

Arthur, not for the first time, wondered why the elderly omegas were such mean old things to their younger counterparts and so focused on children.

“Well come on Arthur.” Alfred grabbed the Brit's hand and pulled him towards the porch, knowing that Arthur would feel better outside.

“Looks like I gotta fatten you up a bit.” He winked jokingly, and Arthur relaxed and smiled back at his boyfriend. “Dad makes amazing burgers and I think Mattie is out there somewhere. I definitely want you to meet him.”

* * *

 Family events like these were nerve-racking for Arthur. Even with his own family.

You meet distant relatives that you only see once a year at most and try to remember who they all are to you through small talk or hushed whispers of inquiry to your mother. It's frustrating. Then the awkwardness of catching up and trying to get to know them again, only to forget the moment they all go home.

It typically starts with: ‘so Arthur, how is school. What do you study? Oh that's interesting! What are you gonna do with that? I’m sure you’ll do great. You found a mate yet? Well, don't worry, you'll be popping out kids before you know it.’

Then even more awkward revelations come up in hushed whispers in kitchens and hallways.

‘Did you hear Jeanne is getting a divorce? Poor thing. What is she going to do? And those poor kids.” Or. “Doesn't Jason looks rounder? He's not drinking anything. I hope it's not that awful alpha he brought here. They’ll shame this family.’

“So Arthur, was it? What are you studying?” Uncle Garth asked. Or was it Gareth? Didn't matter.

Arthur took a sip of his beer, swaying slightly. He was hot. It was the middle of July and the heat outside was unbearable.

“I'm majoring in anthropology with a minor in applied linguistics.” Arthur replied. The same answer he gave to at least ten other people already.

“Oh that's cool! You wanna be an anthropologist? That’s probably going to be hard to get into.” Garth or Gareth replied.

“I guess, but I'm not too worried about it now. Just focusing on getting the degree first.” Arthur forced a smile, his beer bottle sweating in his hand.

“Good man. I'm sure you'll do well.” The beta replied with a reassuring smile before making his escape to talk to someone else.

And on it went.

Alfred was bouncing between his many family members, laughing and joking with them.

Arthur didn't want to be a bother and tried to stay on the sidelines focusing on keeping his anxiety in check.

Normally at his family reunions he would stay for an hour and then disappear to his room. But hiding in Alfred's room might sent the wrong message to these people and Arthur didn't want them to dislike him. Grandma already seemed to hate him, judging by the way she keeps glaring at him every time the Brit comes into her field of vision.

That left Arthur with little else to do but drink one beer after another and make awkward conversation with whoever chooses to approach him.

Someone was calling for the fireworks to be set up. A bunch of alphas gathered on the porch bantering back and forth with each other.

With them too close for comfort, Arthur stood up from the patio chair and made his way inside.

The world was tilting and spinning as Arthur made his way to the kitchen. Passing by people whose faces were getting smeared in Arthur’s eyes as he looked from one excited person to another. Finally getting to the kitchen Arthur sat on the barstool, barely managing to keep upright.

Annabelle was busy rushing back and forth, pulling out plate of food one after another seemingly out of nowhere. Every now and again someone would come in and either bring empty platters back or take away the new ones.

The omega was taking it in stride, chatting with whoever came in and shooing away those who tried to sneak a bite.

Arthur felt dizzy watching her.

“Arthur, dear, are you okay?”

She was suddenly so close to him that her perfume hit the Brit full force and he turned green.

Swiftly Annabelle moved and placed an empty bowl in front of him just as Arthur vomited.

He coughed and spat out the foul liquid.

“Oh honey, did you not eat enough? Just get it all out. You'll feel better after.” She was rubbing his back soothingly. “Can someone get Al?”

It was horrible. Everything swam and felt too hot. A cold towel was pressed to his face. And when Arthur was finally done emptying his stomach he straightened up in the chair away from the bowl, eyes closed and wet with tears.

A cold glass was pressed to his lips.

“Hey Artie, drink some water. Okay?”

Alfred was beside Arthur pressing the glass to his lips. Arthur swayed a little, but grabbed the glass and gulped down the offered drink.

“Feel better? You want another?”

Arthur shook his head and fell against Alfred’s side, nuzzling into him.

“Wanna sleep...” He mumbled into Alfred’s neck.

“Okay. Yeah. Let's get you upstairs.” Alfred was brushing Arthur’s messy hair out of omega’s face.

Arthur didn't really registered what happened next.

There was a collective murmur of “-no, he's okay-” “-just needs to sleep it off-” “-Mattie can you help Al? Here bring up another glass and pills-”

The sensation of floating felt good and then there was nothing.

For about a second, before Arthur sat up wide awake.

His bladder was full, but at the same time the urge to drink cold water was unbearably persistent.

Arthur looked around Alfred’s dark room. The windows were open and curtains pulled back just the way Arthur liked. He got up and stumbled out of Alfred's room, down the hallway to the bathroom. It wasn't till he was sitting down that he noticed that he was wearing Alfred's shirt and boxers.

The house was quiet and Arthur realized he must have blacked out. Finishing up he washed his hands and looked at his bloodshot eyes.

He made a fool of himself in front of everyone. Arthur wanted to kick himself and cry in shame.

Exiting the bathroom the omega crept downstair.

The living room was empty and Arthur was grateful that no one would see him now.

Avoiding the mess of the party, Arthur reached the kitchen and looked around the cupboards for a glass. After finding one and filling it up with ice and water he drained it. Then got another.

Creeping out to the porch the omega shivered from the wind, but being out here and looking at the clear night sky instantly made him feel better. Distantly he heard fireworks still going off at 4am somewhere past the Jones’ property.

“How are you feeling?”

Arthur jumped and turned to look at Alfred.

The alpha was yawning, carrying out his own glass of water. Coming up to the omega, Alfred slid his arm at Arthur's waist, sleepily nuzzling into his hair.

Arthur sighed and leaned against his boyfriend. “I made an idiot of myself.” The omega mumbled dejectedly.

Alfred's fingers gently rubbed against his boyfriend’s hips.

“Nah. Don't worry about it.” The alpha hummed and after a beat he quietly laughed. “You should have told me you were a lightweight. I would have watched you closer.”

Arthur huffed in annoyance. “I only drank ‘cause I was nervous. Now they're going to remember this forever.”

“Yeah maybe, but I’m sure next year someone else will make a bigger fool of themselves. You know, something like this happens every year.” The alpha leaned in and whispered against the omega’s ear, “and here I thought you Brits can hold your liquor better than the Americans.” Alfred teased.

Arthur lightly swatted Alfred's forehead. “You know I grew up here, right? And thanks to America's ridiculous age restrictions on alcohol age, I didn't have as much practice as I may have had in England.” Arthur huffed.

“All I hear are excuses, Artie.” Alfred further teased and Arthur scowled.

Then the omega leaned up and kissed the alpha effectively ending that conversation. He kissed the alpha slowly, rubbing his tongue over Alfred’s lips and after a moment slipped it inside when Alfred’s lips parted. They came up for a breath, barely remembering to hold onto their waters.

Arthur licked his lips and panted against his boyfriend’s mouth, darting his eyes from it to Alfred's eyes.

“Happy birthday you git. Sorry I made you miss the fireworks and cake.”

Alfred hummed, bringing his hand to rub Arthur’s cheek. “Well thank you. The fireworks were fantastic from what I heard, but I can always see them next year. As for the cake, who said I missed it.” The alpha winked.

Arthur gasped in mock offense. “You had cake without me! You're terrible. And here I thought you were taking care of me all night like a proper boyfriend.” Arthur grinned up at Alfred.

“Hey now. I did all I could. Once you passed out, there was only so much I can do. But I'll tell you what. There's still leftover cake in the fridge. Go grab the blankets and we can eat it out here.” Alfred’s eyes were shining with excitement and Arthur found that he couldn’t look away.

“Your parents won't mind? We’re basically having cake for breakfast.”

“Nah, they’re good. Besides it’s still the day after my birthday.”

“You’re spoiled. You know that?”

“You love it!”

After another breathless kiss, Alfred ran to grab the cake while Arthur fetched the blankets. The pair eventually situated themselves under the stars.

Arthur grabbed a piece of cake and held it out for Alfred. The alpha leaned in and easily bit off a piece smothering the chocolate all over his face as he playfully licked Arthur's fingers.

“You haven't opened my present.”

“Oh yeah! Want me to get it now?”

Again the alpha’s eyes were so open and bright that Arthur had to force himself to look away just to remember how to think again.

“No need.” Arthur smiled and took a bite when Alfred offered him a piece. “I knitted you some socks.” Arthur deadpanned.

Alfred looked at him unamused. “You’re kidding me?”

Then they both laughed. “Come ‘ere you.” Alfred pulled them down onto the blankets. Arthur shifted on top of the alpha to make himself more comfortable and not trapped in the alpha’s arms.

Alfred nuzzled his boyfriend's hair affectionately. “Well, I'm sure they'll be better than aunt Francine’s.” He whispered into the night and kissed Arthur’s forehead.

Arthur watched the dark sky with the sun just glowing at the horizon.

Out here, on a hill beneath the sky, Arthur felt free. Despite Alfred’s arms wrapped around his torso loosely. It was both terrifying and exhilarating feeling Arthur ever felt.

“Of course they are. I made them with love.” He whispered back into the night, nuzzling into the alpha’s chest.

Alfred's grip on him tightened and for once Arthur didn't feel the urge to run.

 


	8. Chapter 8

“I hate him.”

Francis tried not to laugh, but a quiet chuckle managed to escape past his lips.

Arthur glared at the alpha over his mug.

“I'm serious, Francis!” Arthur bit out and put his tea on the table.

“Of course, mon ami, but hate is a little too strong of a word.” The Frenchman reached into the box of pastries he brought and fished out an éclair. “You two are just having an argument, that happens to all couples. Soon you'll resolve it and move on.” The alpha finished by biting into the chocolate covered dessert.

Arthur furrowed his brows. “You don't understand. He does it all the time! He knows how much I hate it and, and…” Arthur's eyes roamed the room looking for a suitable word to describe his plight. “It's like he can't control himself.” The omega finished lamely staring into the depth of his tea.

Francis licked his fingers and hummed. “Maybe he can’t? It’s a primal alpha urge, and to try and suppress it takes a lot of self-restraint.”

The omega snorted. “So what, I'm just supposed to lay back and think of England?”

Francis hummed. “Well no. Did you talk about it with Alfred?”

“Of course! But it's the same every time! I'm sorry Artie, I'll try better next time.” Arthur slouched in the chair, his arms folded around himself in comfort. “But each time he loses it and I end up with a panic attack.” Arthur muttered sadly.

“Arthur.” Francis started catching the omega's eyes. “You both knew it wasn't going to be easy. I don't think he's doing it on purpose, it's just going to take some time to figure out.”

“I know. It's just...” Arthur muttered. “Sometimes I think it would be easier if we never dated.”

* * *

The laptop sitting on Arthur's desk cast blue light over the dark room. Some Netflix show flashed on the screen muffling their panting and hushed whispers of encouragement.

Arthur bit his hand as Alfred took him deeper, twisting his tongue over the omega’s length.

The alpha bobbled his head a few more times before taking the omega's cock to the back of his throat, nose pushing into the coarse curls.

“Ah!....Al…” Arthur moaned, back arching and tangled his hand into Alfred’s hair pushing him down. “I’m gonna cum…”

Alfred hummed, the vibrations jolted Arthur as his cock leaked with precum.

The alpha pulled up slowly sucking as he moved off the cock. He paused at the tip, sucking gently. Then swallowed the head for a moment before pulling off completely.

Arthur hissed as cold air shocked the wet head of his cock.

“You alright honey?” Alfred kiss the leaking tip and moved to lightly nibble under the crown.

“Al!” Arthur gripped his boyfriend's hair.

“Too much?” Alfred moved off and came up to kiss Arthur.

The omega couldn't seem to make his lips move to properly kiss the alpha, so he let Alfred lead the sloppy kiss.

Alfred held himself over the omega, but when he tried to push the smaller man down Arthur hastily pushed away breaking the kiss.

“Wait.”

“Arthur…”

“I just need a moment.” He rolled away from Alfred and sat at the edge of the bed to stare at the computer screen.

“Artie…”

A hand reached out and gently rubbed his shoulder. Arthur allowed Alfred to turn him around.

“I don't want you to pin me down again.” Arthur muttered not looking at the alpha.

Alfred exhaled a deep, frustrated breath.

“I know. I’ll try not to do it again.”

“You always say that and then, even if I'm on top, you just flip me over and...and…” Arthur chewed on his lip. A nervous tic he picked up lately.

Alfred noticed, but didn't comment.

“I'm sorry.” Alfred said. He leaned in and kissed the omega’s shoulder. “I'm trying, I do, but in the heat of the moment I lose myself and forget…”

Arthur wanted to be angry at Alfred, but mostly he just felt insecure and uncertain about their relationship than anything else. He turned and laid down beside Alfred. Looking up at his boyfriend, Arthur voiced his doubts.

“What are we gonna do?”

Alfred stared at the omega, bitterness and disappointed pheromones radiating off of him. Alfred laid down, mirroring the omega.

“Try and figure it out as we go along.” He smiled sadly, brushing the messy strands out of Arthur's face.

“You like me being behind you, on our sides. We can do more of that?” Alfred's fingers traced over Arthur's frown and down the omega’s neck. “Or, you know, there's always oral.”

Arthur hummed closing his eyes, distracted by Alfred’s fingers. The silence stretched between them with the distant chatter on the laptop.

Arthur opened his eyes. “What's going to happen when you mate me?”

Alfred frowned in confusion. “Isn't this too early to have this conversation?”

“Why not? We're going to have to talk about it soon.”

Alfred's fingers stopped their gentle stroking and the alpha pulled back his hand. “Arthur, you still have two years of school left.”

“I met your family, I thought we were serious. Or are you having second thoughts?”

“No! Of course not! But...Do we really have to have this conversation now? I mean. We barely figured out how to have sex without you freaking out.”

“That’s exactly why we have to have this conversation.”

“But now? Really?”

“Well, when then? Do you want to make an appointment for us to have all of those adult conversations you keep avoiding.”

“That's the problem with you, Arthur, you need to control everything. Why can't you just enjoy our time together, in the moment, as it comes?”

“Oh please forgive me that I need to know where we stand so that I can feel secure.”

“You know sometimes you just need to, oh I don’t know, trust your partner maybe? And let things come as they may.”

A squeak of a door opening made them both pause. The lights in the hallway turned on and Rebecca padded out of her room to their door.

“You guys mind keeping it down.”

Arthur flushed but called back. “Sorry Rebecca, will do!”

They gazed at each other silently waiting for the other omega to walk back to her room and switch off the lights.

Once they heard a muted sound of a door closing, Alfred sighed.

“This is stupid.”

Arthur’s heart almost stopped. “What is?”

Alfred looked at Arthur, his face a mask. “This argument.”

The alpha grabbed Arthur's hips and pulled the omega to sit on top of him while Alfred laid back on the bed.

“Alfred what are you doing?”

“Just trust me, will you.” Alfred pulled Arthur closer so that their erections were pressed together.

Arthur gasped as Alfred fisted their cocks and began a quick pace. “And stop worrying about everything. Let me take care of you.”

Arthur moaned when Alfred's second hand pressed between his ass cheeks rubbing his hole.

“Alfred….” Arthur arched into the touch.

The omega knew it was a distraction, but he couldn't help but lean forwards balancing his palms on Alfred's pecs. Arthur moved his hips thrusting his cock against Alfred’s and back into the fingers in his ass.

“You think I can't smell it on you, Artie?” Alfred's panted, his brow in light sweat. “You still have omega needs that are not being satisfied.” He twisted his fingers and mercilessly rubbed against Arthur's inner walls making sure to press extra hard against the omega’s prostate. “I lose control because everything in me is urging to sate you like an omega should be. To pin you down and take you, fill you up and stuff you with my knot….”

Alfred's fingers inside Arthur pulled apart stretching and exposing the hole.

Arthur choked on his moan, his hole trying to tighten around the fingers that continue to spread him open. Cursing he fell down onto his elbows hovering over Alfred.

The alpha continued the work over their erections through Arthur's orgasm, and eventually reaching his own.

Arthur pressed his mouth over Alfred's in a lazily kiss, slowly rubbing their tongues together.

They pulled apart and Alfred grinned. “See, we learned something new today honey.”

Arthur smiled and got off the bed to close the computer screen.

It wasn’t till after they both cleaned up and snuggled under the covers, that Arthur couldn't shake off the feeling that some kind of wall just came up between them.

 


	9. Chapter 9

“You guys gonna go to the state fair?” Antonio asked.

“Yeah, might be fun!” Alfred grinned at his friend.

Arthur sharply looked up from his laptop at his boyfriend. “I don't think that’s a good idea.”

Alfred frowned at the omega. “Oh come on. You never want to do anything. Let's go and have a good time for once, Mr. grumpy pants.”

Antonio glanced at Francis uncomfortably, the later alpha just shrugged helplessly.

“Like at that sorority’s charity event last week?”

Alfred slurped his Pepsi loudly, brows cast down in irritation. “It's not my fault you decided to run away.”

“Umm...Maybe you guys can decide later?” Antonio asked awkwardly.

“I did not run away.”

“Sure buddy, we'll let you know.”

Arthur and Alfred said at the same time.

Francis and Antonio looked at each other again in worry.

“I have a class to go to.” Arthur said suddenly, quickly packing away his laptop and papers.

Alfred grabbed his own bag. “I better walk him or else he might get trampled or something.”

Arthur glared and briskly marched away from the group.

Alfred was quick to follow after. The alpha stayed slightly behind the omega glaring at anyone who comes too close.

“You don't have to walk me to class you know.”

“Sure I do. Who's going to take care of you if you have another attack?” Alfred reached out and gently gasped Arthur's arm guiding him closer to the wall, trying to keep to the edge and not have the crowd swallow and separate them.

Arthur tensed at the contact, but he allowed his boyfriend to lead him. As much as he hated to admit it right now, having Alfred by his side tended to keep him calm and other people away. It was something that Arthur was grateful for, but the current conversation was frazzling his nerves.

“Like you did at that charity?” Arthur bitterly countered.

“I told you to stay by the table, not try to dash through the room.”

Alfred stopped and made Arthur wait till the busy entryway cleared instead of pushing through it.

“I didn't want to go in the first place, remember? And when I told you I wanted to leave you completely ignored me.” Arthur hissed at the alpha as he patiently watched the rowdy students push through the doorway.

“It wasn't even five minutes in since we got there and already you started to whine like a child.” Alfred barked back.

“Whatever.” Arthur spat, and shook off Alfred’s hand stiffly walking out of the commons building seeing that the exit was clear enough.

They reached the building the omega needed to go to on the other side of the campus in silence.

“I don't want to go to the fair.” Arthur said again as they climbed the empty staircase in the old building.

“You don't seem to want to do anything these days.” Alfred said, his voice bouncing off the walls ringing in their ears.

Once on the second floor hallway both men again went silent, avoiding people that walked by them. Stopping outside Arthur’s classroom the couple regarded one another. Both knowing full well that Arthur's class wouldn't start for another hour.

Finally Alfred said. “Just think about it. I'll come get you after your class.”

Without waiting for Arthur’s respond Alfred leaned in and kissed Arthur's cheek in a hurry before rushing away.

Arthur stared after his boyfriend feeling his heart ache. Since when did Alfred's kisses became so hollow?

* * *

 The university felt empty as they walked through the darkness between the tall campus buildings. It was Friday and many of the students were either at the state fair or in town grabbing a drink with their friends after a long week of classes.

“So really." Alfred started. "How come you didn’t want to go anywhere tonight?” The alpha asked quietly, the wind almost carrying off his words unheard.

Arthur was walking beside his boyfriend, but kept his distance not wanting the alpha to touch him.

“I told you. I have to study for a makeup test for English.” The omega easily lied.

The wind picked up rustling leaves and tearing some of them from the trees.

“You could have told me that earlier.” Alfred grumbled, distracted by two girls running to get inside the library away from the cold wind.

The tall dark haired girl pulled her redhead companion into the building, their happy laughter just barely reached his ears.

“I did. You didn’t listen”

Alfred ignored Arthur’s condescending tone.

They finally reached the omega’s dorm. Once in front of the door, Arthur fiddled with his keys willing his shaking fingers to work. The omega chewed on his bottom lip as the alpha behind him patiently waited like he usually did. After a couple of unsuccessful tries the lock finally clicked and Arthur released a breath he didn’t know he was holding. He opened the door and stepped inside the dark room, barely lit by the street lights coming through the windows.

Making up his mind, Arthur turned and put his arm out against the doorframe just as Alfred moved to follow after.

“I think I'd like to be alone tonight.” Arthur said looking up at Alfred with guarded eyes.

Alfred arched a brow. “Really?”

Arthur nodded.

“Then I guess I'll go back to my dorm.” The alpha simply said.

Guilt bubbled up inside and Arthur looked down biting his already swollen lip.

“Isn't there a party somewhere or a bar? You could go with Gilbert.” Arthur said weakly.

“I could.” Alfred replied. “But you won't come with me?”

Arthur shook his head.

“So you want me to go, but you won't come anywhere with me.” Alfred’s crossed his arms in front of him, unimpressed with his boyfriend’s behaviour.

Arthur felt a rush of irritation at the typical tone the alpha used with him lately.

“Alfred, please. I'm tired tonight.”

“Oh course, sweetheart, you take your rest.”

Alfred didn't kiss him this time. Just a lingering look before walking away.

Arthur watched Alfred leave. He wanted to call back, reach out and hug the alpha. Reassure the American that he just needed some time to figure out what was wrong and fix it.

But Arthur didn’t.

Instead he chose to say and do nothing. He simply turned and closed the door.


	10. Chapter 10

“Yes, like two weeks from now. Is that ok?”

Arthur distantly heard Rebecca talking on the phone.

“I think it'll work out. Yeah.”

He took out a roll of plastic wrap and tore a sheet.

“Okay. I'll see you then. Love you!”

Arthur covered the leftover salad with the sheet before placing the bowl in the fridge.

“Well, that's taken care off.” She said coming out of the bedroom. “You need any help?”

Arthur turned to her. “No. I got it.” He paused. “Sorry for the inconvenience.”

She waved him off. “Don't worry about it. I needed an excuse to see Brian anyways.”

Rebecca sat at the small desk in their shared living/dining room opening her laptop to continue on her paper. “He didn't say it, but I know he's pleased. You know how alphas are.”

Arthur chewed on his lip. Then he grabbed his tea and went back to his spot on the couch by the window. The book he was reading was still open on the introduction and was placed face down on the armrest. Arthur picked it up to resume reading, but he couldn’t seem to focus on the words. The Brit’s eyes kept darting to his roommate mulling over his dilemma.

“Spit it out Arthur.”

Startled out of his thoughts Arthur almost dropped his teacup. “Oh...umm...well.” He took a moment to gather his wits. “You drive to see your boyfriend, right? But he never come here…” Arthur awkwardly said.

“Yeah? He doesn't have a car.”

“And you don't mind?”

“No, not really.” She looked up at Arthur then leaned back in her chair, tipping it backwards on its two back legs. “We decided to move in together after grad so he's saving up right now. So, there's really no point for him to get a car when I have one.”

“Do you ever feel like you're imposed upon? I mean...it's a four hour drive.”

Rebecca hummed, rocking back and forth on the chair.

“Well...sometimes, I guess, it’s a bit of a hassle to drive that long only for a weekend,” she smiled, “but once I'm there, it's worth it.”

“I see.” Arthur said and looked back at his book.

Rebecca continued looking at the British omega with a puzzled gaze. She leaned forward, the chair back on all four legs, and propped her head on her arm fixing a pointed stare at her roommate.

“How are you and Alfred?”

Arthur, having just sipped his tea, almost choked on it.

“He's fine.”

“I haven't seen him around much.”

“He's been busy.”

“Ah, okay.” She opened her laptop again and continued to type.

Arthur resumed to once again try to read the printed words he was supposed to have finished last week, but found it difficult to comprehend what exactly he was reading. He wanted to at least get through the introduction before calling it quits.

“You know...Alphas are just as needy as omegas. They just don't voice it as much as we do.”

Arthur looked up but Rebecca was looking over her research notes.

“Really? How so?”

Rebecca glanced up and said. “Come on Arthur, really?” She raised a brow at him.

Arthur blushed and looked down at his book in embarrassment.

Rebecca put down her note. “Sorry.” She cringed as herself. “Well...alphas are physical creatures. Right? They, I guess, need to see that their partner is still interested. Whether it’s by spending time together or….or like physical contact. Like…” She blushed. “...Well, I think it’s kinda sweet how much attention they actually need.” Rebecca laughed self-consciously looking away in embarrassment. “I guess, well...I guess I’m okay with making that drive simply because I know it makes Brian happy.”

She opened her mouth to say more but her face was completely flushed red.

Not wanting to pry into her relationship anymore then she was willing to share, Arthur didn’t ask her to elaborate.

Both omegas went back to their homework in silence.

But the thoughts swirled in Arthur’s head, prevented him from finishing that introduction.

* * *

 

Arthur gave it another few hours before leaving his dorm. It's not like he didn't want to admit that Rebecca was right. It's just that he was embarrassed that he was that easy to read.

After she left for class, Arthur gathered his nerves and headed out to Alfred's dorm.

They very rarely spend time at the alpha’s apartment. Mainly because Arthur was more comfortable at his own place, but also because Gilbert tended to irritate the omega. Arthur really hoped that the arrogant alpha was out so that he could calmly talk with his boyfriend.

Once he reached the dorms, Arthur nodded a greeting to the front desk beta and spent a few minutes just staring at Alfred's front door.

Then he steeled his nerves and knocked.

A few minutes later he was face to face with a surprised looking Alfred.

“A-Arthur?” The alpha stuttered. “What-what are you doing here?” The American was in his sweatpants and hoodie looking like he just rolled out of bed.

“Is Gilbert out? I need to talk with you alone.”

“Ahhh…” The alpha nervously closed the door a little more. “No, he’s not here.. Whatcha need?”

Picking up on Alfred's anxious scent Arthur furrowed his brows in concern.

He reached out and touched his boyfriend's cheek. “Are you okay? What's wrong Al?”

Alfred's shoulders dropped in defeat and he nuzzled into Arthur’s palm his own hand came up to cover the smaller one on his cheek.

“I'm fine. Sorry. You just caught me by surprise.” The alpha let go and opened the door for the omega.

“Well. Come in.” The alpha's face turned red as he allowed Arthur to pass.

The anxiety on Alfred was mixed with embarrassment and when Arthur walked to the living room area he raised an eyebrow at the scene.

“What's this?”

Alfred closed the front door and came up beside Arthur looking at the state of the room face still red.

“Ah...my pity party?” The alpha nervously laughed and felt his face burn up even more once Arthur's green eyes were on him.

The omega didn't really know what to say. He looked back at the numerous take out containers, bags of chips, pieces of half eaten muffins, video games and movie cases. There was, what looked like a pause scene from a horror movie on the screen, but what was more questionable than Alfred’s movie choice was on the couch.

Arthur moved through the mess cautiously towards the object and stared at it. Nested in a mix and match of multiple blankets was a body pillow with a printed image of a bunny, completed with a pair of ears sewed on top.

He looked at it. “Is this…? Isn't this...umm...for alpha...children?”

Alfred wanted the ground to swallow him up right there.

“Aha….yes.” He laughed nervously. “Gilbert got it for me as a joke.” He quickly replied in one breath. He wanted to turn this whole situation into a humorous joke, but the effort to do so left him.

Arthur turned to face his boyfriend, frown deep. “Do you feel neglected?”

Alfred sighed and plopped down onto the couch grabbing the pillow squishing it to his chest. “Well, my boyfriend doesn't like it when I hug him.” He replied dejectedly. “At least the bunny doesn't try to break free from me.”

Arthur stared down at Alfred and felt his heart ache.

“I'm sorry.” He said weakly wanting to find the right words to comfort his boyfriend, but his brain went blank momentarily.

Alfred sighed. “Nah, it’s not your fault. I just...well…”

Neither knew what to say to each other.

An image of Leslie flashed in Arthur's mind. His elder brother’s mate practically had to move mountains to appeal to their grandmother, despite loathing the elder omega. He would bite his tongue and would try to please the bitter woman as best he could, but of course in her eyes it was never enough. Still, Leslie loved Allister more than anything. Arthur remembered wondering how much love a person would need to put up with the constant complaints, and if Arthur one day would be willing to do the same.

Maybe in every relationship both partners had to make sacrifices and come to a compromise for them to grow as a couple who bonded for life.

“Do you want to finish that movie?” Arthur asked.

Alfred nodded face in a controlled mask, but Arthur could see the alpha’s eyes were turning red and watery, he also smelled distress radiating off of Alfred.

Arthur gently took one of the bunny's ears and pulled it away.

Alfred resigned and let him take it.

The omega let the toy drop by his feet. Then he took his coat and sweater off, leaving his tank top on. Toeing off his shoes Arthur resolutely grabbed Alfred's hand and climbed into the alpha’s lap.

He wrapped Alfred's arms around him and hesitantly leaned back into the alpha.

Arthur closed his eyes and exhaled through his mouth. Alfred's arms tightened around him and Arthur bit on his lip to hold back the panicked whimper.

“Don't do this, Arthur.” Alfred's voice loud in his ear due to proximity.

The alpha started to pull out of the hold but Arthur pulled those hands back around.

“Be patient Al. I just need a moment.” Arthur hissed back slightly annoyed, but focused on the feeling of Alfred holding him.

The way the alpha’s arms circled around his torso. How those thick and powerful arms held him, but also how they never tightened to the point of restraint. Alfred’s solid chest at his back radiating heat and rising with each breath almost in sync with Arthur’s own rhythm. Slowly Arthur felt himself relax and adjust to the feeling of being surrounded. He further leaned into his boyfriend’s embrace, relaxed, allowing their pheromones to freely mix.

Alfred rubbed the omega’s stomach with one hand as the other played with their joined hands. He leaned in and inhaled Arthur’s sweet scent at the omega’s neck. Aware that Arthur is letting him more contact than the omega was usually comfortable with. Alfred focused on controlling his urges and only take as much as Arthur allowed him.

Arthur tightened his hold on Alfred’s hand and raised his head giving Alfred more of his neck when the alpha nuzzled him. Arthur felt the way Alfred kissed him right below his ear then move to scatter light kisses further down.

Alfred’s hand on his stomach paused, holding the omega in place. “Can I bite you?” The alpha asked.

Arthur licked his lips. “Yes.”

Alfred  paused to kiss the area where neck and shoulder meet. Then gave it a broad swipe of his tongue, giving Arthur a moment to calm down. Once the alpha was sure that his boyfriend was ready, he gently bit into the fleshy muscle.

This was not a mating mark, not the kind that drew blood and required the alpha to pin down his mate and hold so that the bite would scar.

No, this was a different kind of bite, one that was shared between courting partners that broadcasted their mutual claim to each other as well as others.

Arthur moaned and craned his head back to rest against Alfred’s shoulder. He raised his arm and tangled his fingers into the alpha’s hair. His instincts were all over the place. The true omega ones where mellowed out and relaxed with content that finally his courting alpha was staking his claim, but the ones that were linked to his phobia swirled on the edges of euphoria. That lingering urge to break free and run, because at any moment the alpha will surely lose control and pin him or refuse to let go.

“Alfred…” Arthur pleaded, hoping the alpha understood.

Alfred released his bite, licking the bruise. Then his arms tightened around his boyfriend and Alfred affectionately nuzzled into his omega’s neck.

“Artie...Thank you.”

Arthur’s heart pounded in his ears as Alfred’s hold constricted him more. He continued to take deep, slow breaths to remain calm and focused on the alpha’s scent. But eventually the restriction became too much.

“Alfred...can you ease up...or something…I- I just-”

Alfred immediately loosened his hold. “Yeah, sure.” He leaned back against the couch watching Arthur sit up, the omega's back rigid.

“Sorry. Too much?”

Arthur didn’t respond right away, but finally he calmed down enough to reach back and hold Alfred’s hand. Rubbing his thumb over the warm flesh he shook his head.

“No...it’s fine…” He said still not looking at Alfred.

He eventually leaned back against his boyfriend, their joined hands now resting in his lap.

“Can we watch the movie now?” Arthur quietly asked, a little exhausted from the surge of emotions and instincts.

Alfred fished out the remote from the pile of blankets. “Of course, honey.”

He kissed Arthur’s head and pressed play.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, we're on the half way point here^^


	11. Chapter 11

“I still don't see why I can't be there for you.” Alfred angrily said.

Arthur bit back his response and instead showed his annoyance by roughly dusting out his nesting sheets.

Alfred eyed his boyfriend's back as the omega sorted through the closet. Their relationship was strained, but they were able to compromise in the past.

This, however, was a whole different matter and neither seemed to want to give in.

“I thought we finally figured this out Artie.” Alfred’s eyes followed Arthur’s every stiff move.

“This is so much bigger than cuddling on a couch, Alfred.” Arthur replied without looking at the alpha.

He grabbed the sheets and pillows and walked them over to his bedroom. One of the blankets fell from his grasp, but Arthur didn't stop to pick it up.

Alfred growled in frustration and rose from the couch to follow Arthur, picking up the blanket on the way.

With it in his hand, the alpha leaned against the doorway and watched as Arthur arranged his nest on his bed by the window.

Usually omegas preferred dark closets for their nest, but Arthur couldn’t stand feeling like he was trapped so the omega build his nest in the open, by the window.

In theory it was fine.

Arthur had all the space he wanted and Alfred would have more room to shift around and arrange them in positions that Arthur wanted and felt safe in. And the omega could pull the curtains back to let more light into the room if he needed to.

But that was exactly the issue Alfred was having trouble with.

Arthur's window faced another dormitory. And just the thought that someone could potentially see his boyfriend out of his mind with heat, and Alfred not even being allowed to spend it with him, didn't settle well with Alfred.

At all.

They fought for almost two weeks leading up to Arthur’s heat and still couldn't find a compromise.

Arthur said he was fine, he done this plenty of times before and didn't want Alfred there.

Alfred's protective instincts were on edge. Wanting to be with his omega to help and protect him. They were dating for roughly six months now, shouldn’t Arthur trust him by now? Alfred tried to do everything he could to make Arthur feel at ease. Wasn’t it enough for the omega?

Arthur turned and walked over to grab the fallen blanked, but Alfred's grip tightened and didn't let the omega take it.

“Come on, Arthur, you gotta meet me halfway here.”

When Arthur just glared back, Alfred couldn't help himself.

“Why can't you just trust me?! I tried and I worked hard to make you as comfortable as I can. I ignore my instincts just to cater to your needs, when everything inside me is screaming to listen. Why can't you-” He cut himself off.

Arthur's eyes were watering, but steeled in stubborn determination.

Alfred's own eyes were stinging, heart aching and beating fast.

“Why can you give this one thing to me?” Alfred whispered.

“I-” Arthur bit his lips. “I can't do this.”

Alfred’s heart skipped a beat then dropped down to his stomach in dread.

“You can't do this?” He repeated. “As in. You can't deal with me nagging you anymore? Is that it?”

Green eyes flashed with anger. “You knew what you were signing up for from day one. It's not my fault you can't handle-”

“Oh I can't handle it? Is it now? Well guess what, sweetheart, you can't just expect me to kneel down to your every whim just 'cause you have a thing. Why is it that it's always me who has to yield? What about my needs?”

“Fuck you, Alfred!” Arthur yelled. “I yield and compromise for you as much as I can and if you can’t handle it then go! I don't want you here!”

“Oh yeah, of course. You had to give up so much. It’s not like everyone has to accommodate our poor little Arthur in every way they can. And god forbid, if something happens that his royal highness doesn't like, then he just pushes them away!”

Arthur dropped his grip on the blanket and ran to grab the pillows off the bed.

“Get out, get out, get out!” Throwing the pillows at the alpha, Arthur yelled at Alfred. “Fuck you! I never want to see you again, asshole!”

Easily deflecting the four throw pillows, Alfred silently stared at Arthur crying in the middle of his ruined nest.

The anger left him and only anguish remained. He wanted nothing more than hug Arthur close and never let go. To soothe and wipe away the tears. But Arthur made it perfectly clear, time and time again, that he didn't need those things.

So instead of listening to his instincts, Alfred turned away and walked out of Arthur's life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This scene was the start of all this madness aha....


	12. Chapter 12

It wasn't all bad.

Being alone. That's what Arthur was used to anyways. He could push through day after day focusing on school and ignoring everything else. 

But for some reason every time he saw Alfred, Arthur felt like he was shoved into a box and couldn’t get out. His increased panic attacks lead the omega to avoid his ex-boyfriend as much as possible and Alfred seemed to make an effort in avoiding their usual hangout places.

The fall semester continued as if Arthur's whole world didn't just collapse under his feet. To avoid thinking about it too much Arthur focused on his classes with more vigor and barricaded himself either in his room or the library. 

But even at this large university, the omega couldn't avoid Alfred forever.

It caught him by surprise. 

One moment Arthur was walking through the library doors and the next he couldn’t breath and his heart erupted with pain.

Upon walking through those doors, he spotted Alfred with an omega. His arm wrapped tightly around her, beaming down with his beautiful smile that made Arthur's knees wobble.

Arthur froze in the doorway just as Alfred looked up his eyes meeting Arthur’s. 

The moment stretched and pain flashed in Alfred's blue eyes, then it was broken as he looked down at the girl as they walk past Arthur. 

The Omega trembled. Tears spilled and ran down his cheeks. 

‘Not even a month in, that bastard.’ The thought crossed his mind unintentionally.

Hot, wet trails ran down his cheeks and Arthur couldn't deal anymore. He turned and ran back to the only place left where he could feel safe.


	13. Chapter 13

“Arthur left school for medical reasons.”

“What?” Alfred’s head jerked up from his book to meet Francis’ worried gaze.

“I got a call from his mother last week. Apparently he was suffering from extreme stress and anxiety that delayed his heat a month ago. You know how dangerous it is for omegas to miss their heat, right?”

“Yeah, I know.” Alfred leaned back in his chair, notes forgotten. He looked up at Francis. “What do you want me to do? He made it perfectly clear he didn't want me.”

“Alfred. I know Arthur wasn't easy to be with, and I do know both of you tried the best you could. But, you were also his first relationship.”

Alfred shrugged. “Well, he's not my responsibility now.”

Francis tsked in annoyance. “Come on, Alfred, how long are you going to lie to yourself and Natalya? You think she doesn't notice?”

Alfred growled. “Stay out of it.”

“Fine, fine. It's none of my business what you do.” The other alpha got up. “I just thought you should know about Arthur. That all. See you later, Alfred.”

As Francis walked away, Alfred couldn’t get the image of Arthur crying in his ruined nest out of his mind. 

Maybe that was the one time he should have heeded his instincts with Arthur?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is 'tsked' a real word??? Idk...I found it in the dictionary, but is it used correctly? Hmmm....


	14. Chapter 14

“Arthur, darling, you really should come down and eat something.” His mother's voice drifted through the door.

Arthur was laying on his bed, staring at the bright blue sky out of his window.

“I'm not hungry, mum.” He called back.

The sunny day reminded Arthur too much of Alfred. He turned around to stare at his messy room instead. Arthur heard his mother's sigh outside the door, before the older omega silently walked away.

Being at home was depressing.

At least at the university no one would pester him for missing meals. Here, in his family home, his alpha father would eventually force Arthur to eat or shower or any other basic human necessities that Arthur failed to do.

The omega didn't even fully understand what happened.

One moment he was pursuing his educational goals, had an amazing boyfriend, and the next he couldn’t even get out of bed to brush his teeth.

Alfred's hurt face haunts his dreams.

All the omega wants to do is to crawl into a dark, secluded space and whine for the alpha. But, the one time Arthur tried, he ended up with yet another panic attack and his father had to calm him in the middle of the night.

He couldn’t even finish the fall semester.

With the advice of his therapist, Arthur withdrew from his classes a month before exams started. The omega couldn't believe his weakness, no matter how many times the doctor tried to reassure him that it wasn't Arthur’s fault.

And to a certain extent Arthur knew it wasn't his or even Alfred's fault. Their relationship just didn't work out. That’s it.

But...

Seeing Alfred with someone else.

Someone who didn't require special demands. Someone Alfred can hold and bite all he wants and they wouldn’t feel the urge to run.

Seeing Alfred _smile_ at someone else.

That broke Arthur.

He couldn’t handle it and so he ran.

He ran away like he usually did when facing a situation he couldn’t deal with. It was easier to close his eyes, count to ten, and wait it out. That's what he usually did.

So why wasn't it working now?

He removed himself from the person that made him feel trapped, and yet it didn't help. In fact, he was worse off now.

The holidays were fast approaching and Arthur would be forced to go out and socialize with his family. To see his cousins and brothers in perfectly normal functioning relationships, while Arthur would be pitied at worse.

He couldn't handle that. No like this.

He needed to get out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: This chapter may be a little rushed? I wanted to update as soon as I could as I will be away for about 2 weeks, and I'm not sure if I will have access to the Internet so the next update may be late, but I wanted to give you guys something in the mean time. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading, commenting, and leaving Kudos! I really appreciate it^^


	15. Chapter 15

“Alfred? Did you clean your room?”

Alfred groaned. “Yes mom!” He yelled through his door hoping she heard him downstairs.

“Alfred!?”

“Oh my god.” Alfred muttered and got up from his bed.

He opened the door and scornfully called back. “I did mom!”

“Don't sass me! Come down here!”

Not having much of a choice, Alfred slowly stalked downstairs. His eyes narrowed in suspicion when the alpha saw his mother sitting at the counter smiling innocently.

“Oh good. You finally decided to grace me with your presence.” Annabelle gestured to a barstool across from her.

Alfred dragged himself to the seat making his movements as put upon as possible.

Annabelle pleasantly smiled at her son. “So…when are you going to introduce your new girlfriend to us?”

Alfred groaned. “How did you even know about her?”

“Please Alfred. I'm your mother." Her grin widened in victory. "Besides, you were never a good liar.”

Alfred slouched in his chair. “I don't want to introduce her to the family. It's too soon.” Alfred muttered not looking at his mother.

“Okay.” Annabelle said simply. “You can go to her place, you know.”

“Yeah…” Alfred half heartedly agreed.

“You don't want to.” Annabelle's smile vanished.

Alfred crossed his arms in a defensive gesture. “No."

“Do you like to spend time with her?” The older omega questioned.

“I guess.” Alfred couldn't look at his mother, his face flushed with shame.

“Alfred.” Annabelle had that disapproving tone in her voice.

“It's too soon to label anything between us.” Alfred defended.

“But with Arthur it wasn’t?” She questioned.

“That's different,” Alfred’s voice shook with frustration and pain. "I liked him for a long time. Even before we started to date."

Annabelle arched her eyebrow at her son, unanswerable question at the tip of her tongue. Then she clicked her tongue in annoyance and dropped the subject.  

“Well, you're old enough to know what's best for you.” She got up and started to take the clean dishes out of the dishwasher. “I got Arthur a gift, can you pass it on to him?” She said after a pause.  

“What?! No mom. We don't...really talk...anymore.” Alfred mumbled the last part sadly.

“Well too bad. I like Arthur. And your father and I got him something for Christmas. It's not our fault you broke up with him.” She lightly countered not looking up from her task.

“Ugh, then why can't you just give it to him.” Alfred barked out angrily.

Annabelle turned, a frown on her face. “Don't you use that tone with me, Alfred Fitzgerald Jones!”

“Sorry mom…” Alfred quietly apologized eyes cast down.

Annabelle leaned against the counter, tapping her index finger in annoyance all the while pinning her alpha son with her sharp gaze.

“It's just a gift, Alfred. You should still be civil to each other. Even if he’s your ex.”

“Yes mom.” Alfred automatically replied without looking at his mother. “…can I go now?”

Annabelle huffed in frustration. “Sure. But go clean your room. I know for a fact that you didn’t.”

Alfred's stalked out of the kitchen without a word.

* * *

 “How were your holidays?” Alfred asked.

“Hmm? Oh, they were fine I guess.” Natalya was looking through the used movie section. Her slim fingers flipped the cases in fast pace, pausing every now and again to scrutinize the cover.

“My family asked about you.” She continued, pulling out one scuffed up DVD to read the back.

“Oh?” Alfred asked in mild interest. “What did they say?”

She put the case back.

“Well, you know the standard. Who is he? When will we meet him? Et cetera, et cetera.”

Alfred hummed. “What did you say?”

Natalya laughed easily at the question, amusement shined in her eyes. She grabbed Alfred's hand and lead them to the music section, the alpha dutifully stumbled after the omega.

“Something along the lines of 'when the time is right.’ That type of thing, you know.” She grinned at the American alpha with mirth. “I think they had their hopes up that I finally found a mate.” She playfully winked at Alfred, giggling at his panicked expression. 

“Oh? And do you think that'll be us?” Alfred felt his throat go dry.

She let go of his hand to look through the CDs and hummed in contemplation.

Alfred stared at the European omega. Confident, beautiful and charming. _'She would make a good mate.'_ He thought absently.

She stopped searching through the cases and turned to the alpha. “Do _you_ think that?”

Alfred jerked, caught of guard by the redirected question.

“Yeah? I guess?”

She arched an eyebrow and smirked. “You guess?”

Alfred swallowed and took his girlfriend in more. As in really looked at her, right here and now.

Sure. He could picture it. Mating her. Buying a house together, where they could build their future. They would have beautiful children with a dog. Or two. He knew Natalya likes dogs. It would be easy to fall in love with this fun and beautiful woman.

Alfred grinned at her. “I know it.”

“Really…?” Natalya turned and gazed at the alpha, her eyes narrowed in disbelief. Then the moment passed and Natalya mirrored Alfred's grin. She playfully grabbed his hand and pulled the baffled alpha out of the store. “Then you have to meet my family!”

Alfred’s heart pounded. “What! Now?”

Her grin widened and eyes sparkled in mischief. “No silly! I want to go into the GameStop first.”

Alfred exhaled a deep breath in relief, then his heart dropped to his stomach with her next words.

“You can meet them for dinner tonight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back^^ Poor Alfred is digging himself deeper and deeper :P Natalya is probably OOC but I didn't want to make up another OC for a fairly large role (sorry!) Well hopefully I can get back into a regular schedule of updating this story.The next few chapters should be out soon! 
> 
> I went back and corrected spelling and grammatical errors in the previous chapter (I don't know how I keep missing them...) If anything stands out please let me know. Thank you!


	16. Chapter 16

“You sure you're okay?” Francis asked once again. 

Arthur was unpacking his things in the new dorm. His doctor's note made it possible for the omega to get a special studio style apartment with windows looking out to the small pond and even skylights on the roof.

These apartments were a new addition to the university campus and usually reserved for bonded alpha/omega couples. Due to this, these apartments had more privacy than the first and second year dorms, which were clustered like chicken coops.

“Yes. I need to get back and finish my degree.” Arthur said as he opened a box labeled ‘clothing.’ “Besides, I think my therapist might be right. I can't keep running away and hiding.” He looked up and sadly smiled at Francis. “Unless I want to be stuck in my parents house for the rest of my life, that is.”

“Alright, mon cher, if you say so.” Francis was sorting through the kitchen, putting cups and plates into their proper place. “There’s a movie screening at the art department tomorrow. Let me know if you want to go with me after your class.” 

This is what Arthur liked about Francis. No matter how bad his phobia and anxiety got, the alpha always made it a point to include Arthur in fun social activities. Even if Arthur at times didn’t want to go, Francis never held it against him. 

“Umm...let’s see...” Arthur mentally envisioned his schedule and considered his options. It was winter semester and since Arthur had to withdraw from the fall term and miss finals, he decided to catch up over the break and use it as an excuse to get out of his parents’ radar.

“I have two classes tomorrow, so I might be tired...and then there’s homework-” Arthur cringed and cut himself off. 

It would be too easy to reject Francis’ invitation, and even if the alpha decides to try and convince him otherwise, the omega knew that ultimately the alpha would heed his wishes. But Arthur wasn’t stupid or completely self-destructive. This was the same path he chose when dating Alfred. The never ending excuses to isolate himself, only to feel guilty about lying to Alfred and making his boyfriend and himself miserable. 

Arthur had enough of that. He was supposed to try harder this time. That’s what he and his therapist agreed on when she wrote him the doctor's note. To stop isolating himself from others and work on living with his phobia. Not be controlled by it. 

“Maybe that would be a good way to relax after class.” Arthur looked up at Francis. “I’ll be like when we were younger, remember?” 

Francis laughed. “How can I forget.” The alpha leaned against the counter and chuckled at Arthur. “Remember that time we went to see Harry Potter and Allister trailed us, thinking I’ll whisk you away or something.”

Arthur snickered at the memory. “I don’t think he appreciated the fact that I wanted you for my big brother instead of him.”

“Which is still baffling considering that you hated me in kindergarten.” 

Arthur’s grin turned somber at the memory and even Francis’ own smile twisted apologetically for bringing up the past .

“Well…” Arthur eventually said. “He wasn’t the one to rescue me when I got locked in that box.”  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter but I hope you enjoyed it anyways^^


	17. Chapter 17

“and that is why hockey is superior to basketball.” Ivan spat the word ‘basketball’ as if it personally offended him.

Alfred's eyebrow twitched in annoyance, trying to resist the urge to punch the Russian in his fat face. Natalya nodded her agreement with Ivan, but then again, she agreed with anything that came out of her cousin's mouth.

“Back in Russia we would never play such a sissy sport.” Ivan continued eyeing Alfred with mocking eyes. “Hockey and football, or rather soccer as you yanks call it here, are the only two sports fit for a real alpha.”

Alfred growled under his breath refusing to look at the Russian and instead directed all his attention on the game.

“I was on a basketball team.” The American bit out.

“Oh?” The other alpha looked amused. “Well, it suits you, Alfred. You are rather puny.” Ivan laughed.

Alfred bristled and turned to lash out. “What did you say commie?!”

Natalya placed a calming hand on Alfred's shoulder. “Easy now, Alfred. He’s just trying to rile you up.” She smiled sweetly and Alfred got a feeling that she wasn't on his side either.

He slouched down on the bench and looked back at the game. They were winning and Alfred should be happily cheering with the rest of the students, but he only felt annoyance and irritation.

“Tell him to keep his stupid remarks to himself.” Alfred muttered, perfectly aware that the grinning Russian alpha could hear him.

Natalya chuckled and leaned against her boyfriend nuzzling into his neck.

“He's just teasing. That how Ivan shows affection.” Her cold fingers grasped his and gently squeezed in comfort. “It makes me so happy that you two try to get along.”

Alfred wanted to snort at that. Getting along? Has the omega not been paying attention to the constant bickering and insults that flew between the two alphas each time they were in the same room. A situation that became frequent since Natalya introduced Alfred to her family. Her alpha cousin was practically glued to her side, never allowing the couple to be alone. Alfred complained, but Natalya only smiled and said is was part of the Easter Europe courting culture.

Their team scored again and the gym erupted in cheers. Natalya grinned against his neck and lightly bit him.

Alfred knew that cue. It was Natalya’s way of telling him that she wanted a kiss, and Alfred would happily oblige. Ivan be dammed. But the American was suddenly distracted by someone on the other side of the gym.

He didn't know why, but _his_ mere presence always pulled Alfred’s attention. Demanding and persistent, a call that Alfred could never fully ignore. The alpha tracked their slow descent down the bleachers with tense apprehension.

Francis crouched down next to someone sitting on the edge and talked with wild gestures to the sitting person. After a moment the student nodded and shifted over making two spaces available on the edge of the bench. Francis nodded his thanks and easily slid in, followed by a more hesitant Arthur. The British omega was tense his face drawn in a frown.

Alfred knew that Arthur didn't care much for sports. Would never go to any of the games, even if it was outside. How did Francis managed to get the omega to come? Alfred just didn’t understand. He spend countless of hours nagging and talking Arthur into going to something as low-key as a mall. A conversation that would almost always turned into a fight which left his vocal cords sore for the rest of the day. 

The game and everything around him was forgotten, as Alfred scrutinized the two more closely. Natalya’s weight on his side a distant presence.

Francis half turned towards Arthur, easily leaning into the omega’s personal space to talk into his ear. Arthur’s expression gradually relaxed and he even smiled weakly, nodding along with whatever Francis was saying.

A wave of jealousy drenched Alfred's body like someone just dumped a bucket of cold water over him. It must have been pretty intense, because Natalya leaned away, and even Ivan was looking at him warily.

But Alfred didn't really register any of that. He was too busy watching Arthur slowly transform into a seemingly calm and happy omega that he should have always been, than the tense and frowning boyfriend Alfred remembered him as.

He suddenly wished he knew what Francis said to Arthur that made the omega so relaxed and trusting of the alpha. The realization that Alfred would never know, hit him harder then it should have, replacing the jealousy with agony.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah why do I enjoy making Alfred suffer so? Oh well :P 
> 
> Ivan may have been a little bit of a jerk here but he's just looking out for Natalya. Also I know nothing of sports except that they involve a lot of physical activity...


	18. Chapter 18

Arthur sighed in relief and pressed the elevator button. He watched the red numbers flash from the ground floor up. It would be a few minuted before it got all the way up to the eighth floor.

The omega looked down at his form. All things considering the meeting went well. The administration accepted his doctor’s note and made exceptions for re-taking the exams Arthur missed last semester. This means two out of four classes were not completely lost and since he caught up over the winter break, Arthur was fairly certain he would be graduating on time.

The elevator finally chimed, indicating its arrival, and the metal doors slowly opened.

Arthur paled a little, but after a moment of hesitation he squeezed into the small box. The omega pressed himself against one of the walls and closed his eyes leaning against the dirty metal.

 _‘It’ll be okay. It’s just the elevator. I’ve done this plenty of times before.’_  
  
Slowly the doors closed and the elevator started to move down from the top most floor to the ground level. The metal clunks of gears moving outside the confined space had Arthur counted off the seconds that he spent trapped between the metal wall and four other people that surrounded him.

This is why he hated going to the Administrative building. It was always busy and crowded with both students, faculty, staff, and god knows who else that had business in the bureaucratic part of the university.

The elevator stopped and Arthur opened his eyes, but to his dismay they were only on the fifth floor. Someone stepped inside and inevitably forced Arthur to pressed against another person behind him.

 _‘Alfred would have forced them to back off.’_ Arthur thought desperately, already sweating under his shirt.

A couple of alphas were eyeing him in concern, but Arthur didn’t want their help. They wouldn’t understand what he needed. If only Francis or Alfred where here. They would know.

 _‘Stop it.’_ Arthur chided himself. He took several deep breaths to calm his pounding heart. ‘ _This won’t kill you. It’ll be over soon.’_ Arthur focused on the numbers above the buttons.

4

_‘And after I’ll get tea and chocolate.’_

3

_‘Since the meeting went well I’ll reward myself.’_

2

_‘Maybe I'll curl up with a book.’_

1

The doors opened and Arthur restrained himself from elbowing everyone out of the way to dart out. Instead he patiently waited for the people at the front to walk out before Arthur hastily darted past everybody and out through the front doors.

The spring air hit him full force. Crisp and clear.

Arthur took a moment to center himself and just breath.

_‘See. That wasn’t the end of the world.’_

He walked back to his dorm, stopping at a cafe for his promised tea and chocolate dessert, but of course it was never that easy.

“Arthur!”

A familiar voice called out his name halting the omega’s steps. He patiently waited for the alpha to catch up before offering a greeting.

“Hey, how is it going?”

Francis waved with a smile. “Class got out early, so pretty good. Yourself?”

“Fine. Just going home.” The omega gestured in the direction of his dorm.

“Oh hey, my friend Michelle is performing at a bar tonight. Want to come with me?”

Michelle was a beta Francis has been infatuated with for the past couple of months and although Arthur wasn’t as excited at spending time with her, he usually agreed to go and give his support. Or at least that’s how Francis put it when Arthur declined a few time. Why Francis would even need support Arthur didn't know. The alpha was confident enough, although Arthur had his suspicions that it was just an excuse to get him to come.

“Umm...today isn’t a good day for me.” Arthur said, his tea was getting cold.

“Oh come on, Arthur. You love punk bands.” Francis tried to entice.

That was true, but the elevator ride left Arthur drained and exhausted. All the omega wanted to do was curl up with a book. At home. Alone.

“No. I’m not feeling it. Sorry.” Arthur muttered and walked away.

Francis, the ever persistent bastard, obviously caught up.

“Are you sure you’re feeling okay Arthur?” Francis pressed and Arthur wanted to hit him.

Instead he bit out.

“I’m fine. I just want to be alone tonight. Okay?” He glared up at Francis and immediately his anger deflated. “Sorry. Today is just _really_ not a good day.”

“It’s okay, mon cher. I didn’t mean to pressure you.” Francis lightly said, despite the concern in his voice.

Arthur stopped and looked up at the alpha. “You don’t have to walk me home. I’m okay. Just need to lie down. You go and have a good time.”

“Of course. Have a good rest of the day, Arthur.” Francis smiled weakly and walked away.

“Tell Michelle I said hi!” Arthur called back.

Francis waved in acknowledgement without turning and Arthur was just glad that this interaction was over.

He really just needed to get home and recharge.

* * *

Alfred was laying on his bed and fiddling with his watch. Along with the knitted socks, Arthur had given the alpha this watch for his birthday. Normally Alfred wouldn't care much for jewelry, but since it was Arthur that picked it out for the alpha that made it special. However, ever since the break up Alfred only wore the watch when he was longing for Arthur. Watching the seconds tick by made Alfred sentimental about the times they shared.

He glanced at the box on his desk. His mother gave him the Christmas present for Arthur and she's been nagging him to deliver it for weeks. Alfred supposed it was only fair. His parents already paid for whatever was inside the box, it would be a waste to let it go unused. Also, Annabelle would know right away if Alfred lied about delivering it. She was, after all, right about Alfred being a terrible liar.

So really Alfred didn't even have a choice in the matter.

He glanced at his watch. It was half past four. Arthur should be home by now. Or maybe he has class? Or with Francis…Alfred stopped that thought, feeling his irritation flare-up.

Sighing Alfred got up from his bed and grabbed the package.

Might as well get this over with.

* * *

Who was he kidding. The thought of seeing and talking with Arthur sent Alfred's heart rapidly beating in his chest from anxiety and excitement.

Alfred was standing outside Arthur’s dorm debating his life choices up to this point.

An hour before, Alfred bumped into Francis, secretly relieved that Arthur wasn't with the alpha. In a moment of childish panic Alfred shoved the box at Francis telling him to pass it along.

However Francis had other plans, and shoved the box right back at Alfred, telling the American to grow a pair along with Arthur's new address. Which lead Alfred to where he was now. Standing outside of Arthur’s dorm debating how mad his mother will be if he just threw the box away.

Apparently mad enough to get Alfred’s butt into the lobby of the building.

“Can I help you?”

“Umm...yeah.” Alfred approached the security desk. “I need to give this to Arthur Kirkland.”

“Are you a student?” The beta woman asked.

Alfred nodded and quickly fished out his ID.

She glanced at it and said. “Alright, third floor apartment 32”

Alfred nodded his thanks and went to the stairs. He suddenly paused and looked up. If Arthur wasn't with Francis he would be home now. All Alfred had to do was go up, knock on his door, have a simple conversation, give the box over and go home.

 _'Maybe Arthur would invite me in?'_  Alfred frowned at the traitorous thought. ' _What would Arthur do? Probably reject me again.'_

In a moment of panic Alfred turned around and marched back to the desk.

“Actually, I have somewhere I need to be could you pass it along thanks!” Alfred blurted out in a single breath before running for the doors.

He was such a coward.

* * *

It was close to midnight when Arthur finally emerged from his dorm to make a quick run to the 24 hour convenience store on campus.

He was about to leave when the security guard called out.  
  
“Kirkland?”

“Yes?” Arthur turned to address the beta.

“There’s a package for you.”  
  
Arthur curiously walked to the desk and accepted the box. It was nothing special, just a standard cardboard box with ‘Arthur Kirkland’ neatly printed on the top.

“Thank you.” Arthur quickly said and hurried back to his apartment.

He wasn’t expecting anything, but the parcel certainly piqued his interest.

Once inside Arthur opened the box and moaned at the scent that instantly hit his nose. Not thinking clearly, the omega leaned in and practically put his head into the box. Moment later he snapped out of it and shoved the box away.

 _‘You've got to be kidding me.’_ Arthur thought and immediately grabbed his phone, opening a blank text message to berate the alpha. But once his finger was hovering over Alfred’s name Arthur hesitated.

This was probably a bad joke and Alfred was being a dick. But Arthur knew, for all of Alfred’s flaws he was never this mean.

Arthur put the phone away and cautiously walked back to the box. Opening it his eyes narrowed in concentration to resist the alluring scent, but still he reached in and pulled out the softest blanket he ever had the pleasure of holding.

It was one of those blankets especially made for heats and, more importantly, traditionally given by the alpha’s family pack to the courting omega as a sign that they were accepted into their family.

Arthur gasped in awe as he unfolded the large blanket.

Unexpectedly a hoodie fell down from it that Arthur immediately recognized as Alfred’s. He reached down and picked up the worn article of clothing and without thinking buried his face in it. Arthur moaned and sat on the floor just sniffing it. Minutes later he came back to himself and flushed in embarrassment.

The omega didn’t realized how much he missed that scent. Looking over at the blanket Arthur imagined Alfred buying it and stuffing the hoodie inside, but then he scratched that thought. No alpha would ever dare to gift an omega this particular blanket. It was solely the duty of the alpha's parents.

Arthur imagined Annabelle secretly folding the hoodie between the blanket to scent it, and that scenario Arthur could picture perfectly.

 _‘Too bad that it didn’t work out.’_ Arthur thought regretfully.

He got up and packed up the blanket back into the box. When he reached out for the hoodie Arthur hesitated.

Alfred most likely didn’t know what was in the box. Arthur rubbed his fingers over the collar when the scent was most prominent. Alfred also had a girlfriend, but Arthur had no one. Thoughts immediately flooded his brain. _‘Lately, I do have trouble sleeping at night...Maybe this would help me get a good night rest? Alfred does have a very nice alpha smell.’_  Arthur pulled the hoodie on and inhaled Alfred’s scent feeling his muscles instantly relax.

A little self indulgence never hurt anyone. Right?

* * *

Extra:

_To mom: Where’s my Avengers hoodie?_

_To Alpha-Child #2: I can’t keep track of all your things Al. Learn how to be a grown up already._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aha Annabelle had enough of Alfred's shit :P
> 
> Somehow I kept getting sidetracked while editing this chapter....about 4 more to go^^


	19. Chapter 19

This was his final semester.

Alfred should have been ecstatic that all this hard work will finally pay off. Or at the very least he’ll be less stressed, but instead he was just done. Really tired and irritated and done with everything and everyone.

The remainder of the winter was spent between his and Natalya’s house. Both their families excited that the couple will graduate together, and move in, and get bonded and, and, and…..and Alfred was getting fed up with all those ands.

He angrily blew bubbles through his straw, making the coke fizz inside the paper cup.

This was his final semester and Alfred was tired and filled with irritation and dread.

So really, it probably didn't help that Gilbert and Francis decided that they need to get their friend group together during spring break before the finals and last minute assignments consume all their time.

This was exactly how Alfred ended up with Natalya pressed against his right side and Arthur seated directly opposite him. Francis, sat next to Arthur, and was talking to Michelle. Gilbert was bickering with Elizaveta and Romano was yelling at Antonio. Romano's loud yelling ringing in Alfred's ear.

Their chatter competed with other groups in the tiny restaurant. The place was crowded with families and students enjoying the warm sun and freezing atlantic water.

When they first saw each other, the ex-couple shared an awkward greeting with Arthur stiffly shaking Natalya’s hand. A few words of greeting were all that Alfred got before the omega made a hasty escape back to Francis.

Alfred supposed that, yes, it was uncomfortable seeing your ex again, especially with a new partner by his side, but still Alfred somehow felt cheated by the lukewarm greeting.

Alfred tried not to seek Arthur out throughout the trip, but somehow his eyes kept finding the omega. Maybe it was a habit he developed from when they were together, but Alfred had to keep reminding himself that Arthur wasn't his responsibility anymore and that he should be enjoying his time with Natalya.  

Besides, it seems that Francis was doing a superb job of making Arthur feel at ease, even in this crowded place.

Alfred gripped his paper cup tighter in irritation, watching as Francis moved to make more room for Arthur, so that the omega could easily get up and leave if he needed to. Touching Arthur's shoulder lightly before leaning in and excitedly talking in the omega's ear. Always giving Arthur lots of space around his body, but somehow including the omega in everything.

And although Arthur looked mildly tense he stayed and participated in the conversation. Arthur didn't miss out on any of the group activities all week. Simply refusing anything outside his comfort zone, but not dashing for the hills either.

Which was a lot more than Alfred got. Sure he was happy to see Arthur being social, but it still irked him.

How was this fair when Alfred had to practically move mountains to get Arthur to do anything social? And then track the elusive omega down to do damage control once the omega ran off in fright.

“Alfred!” Natalya waved her hand in front of his eyes. “Did you hear me?”

“Um, what?” Alfred looked down at his girlfriend.

“I said, I want to go to the water.” She repeated.

“Oh, okay.” With a quick look at Arthur, they got up and left the group to go dip their toes into the still too cold water.

Arthur’s quiet laughter at something Francis said followed Alfred as he walked further away.

He couldn’t remember hating anything else more than this.

* * *

 

It seems Natalya made is her personal mission to make this trip as miserable for Alfred as possible. Although she couldn’t have been doing it on purpose, right?

She couldn’t have known that wanting a get mango ice cream would remind Alfred that that was Arthur’s favourite flavour. Or when dragging him swimming in the freezing water, would bring up the memory at the beach last summer when Alfred slipped on some rocks and accidentally pulled Arthur in with him. Passing by gift and boutique shops in the small town Natalya would stop and examine the knit dolls criticising the ‘old fashioned junk’ and Alfred would have to bite his tongue remembering the socks that Arthur knitted just for him with lov-.

No. Of course she didn’t know. Nor did she pay attention to Arthur’s tense posture when the omega unintentionally saw the tiny glimpses of what they used to have together and were now shared by another.

But Alfred noticed them and each time had to avert his eyes and remind himself yet again that Arthur wasn’t his anymore.

So when Natalya suggested they go out clubbing for their last night, Alfred got a flashback to the frat house party and was immediately worried for Arthur.

* * *

 

After hours of sweaty dancing and countless drinks Alfred was ready to go back and sleep everything off, but of course Natalya had other plans.

“One more drink.”

“One more dance.”

She pleaded for the past hour, her voice barely audible over the loud bass.

Eventually Alfred had to leave to use the bathroom. All those drinks had to go somewhere.

He stumbled through the crown to the back. Navigating the labyrinth of black painted hallways and random strangers, the alpha finally located his goal.

He walked into the bathroom. The small room almost as crowded as the dance floor. Two stalls were out of order, the last one had a couple making out in it with and drunk audience cheering them on.

Assessing his options Alfred stumbled out on the room and into the second bathroom. This one had a crying omega and several female alphas trying to comfort the crying girl, but the stall was thankfully open. Even if it was missing a door.

Finishing up and washing his hands, Alfred looked at his grim reflection.

Dark bags under and bloodshot eyes....super attractive.... He eyed the crying girl in the mirror. Her makeup smeared down her rounded face as one of the alpha’s tried to wipe the steaks with a paper towel.

After splashing some water on his face, Alfred left the bathroom and made his way back to Natalya on the dancefloor ready to put his foot down and go back to the hotel.

Except he never made it.

Out of the corner of his eye a flash of blond caught his eye and Alfred was instantly on the alpha that crowded Arthur against the wall. He didn’t think. Just one look at Arthur triggered all those repressed feelings and instincts.

Grabbing the alpha by the scruff of his shirt Alfred threw the man off of Arthur.

“Fuck! What’s your problem!?” The stranger growled, teeth bared.

Alfred raised his fist ready to punch the fucker. “Get off him!” He growled back.

There was a tense moment when the two alphas size each other up, ready to fight, but the club's bouncers quickly spotted the two and put a stop to any violence by throwing them out.

“Fuck ya’ll! His cunt ‘s probably ugly anyways!” The alpha yelled and stumbled down the alley.

Alfred growled muscles tense ready to chase and beat the drunk down.

Arthur’s hand lightly touched his bicep and Alfred shook off his anger. He looked down at the omega.

“You alright? That asshole didn’t do anything you didn’t want. Right?” Suddenly feeling stupid at his actions Alfred hoped he read the situation correctly and that Arthur didn’t, in fact, want the other alpha.

“No. I’m fine. Really.” Arthur chewed on his lip. A nervous tick, Alfred remembered. The alpha reached out and brushed Arthur’s neck lightly with his thumbs like he use to do to calm the omega.

“Sorry for getting you kicked out.” Arthur muttered, closing his eyes and raising his head to display his neck to Alfred.

“Nah, I was ready to go anyways.” Transfixed on Arthur’s face, Alfred couldn’t look away.

“I was looking for Francis to ask if we could go, but he seemed like he was having a good time, so I went to wait by the wall, then that alpha cornered me.” Opening his eyes Arthur looked at Alfred.

“Thank you.”  
  
And it all suddenly clicked.

All his irritation and misplaced anger. With two simple words said in pure sincerity, Alfred's world was finally making sense again.

Looking down at Arthur, this weird omega that Alfred pined for for so long. That he had and then cast away because it was too hard. This wonderful omega that Alfred loved but in a moment of stupidity and insecurity stopped fighting for him and just walked away.

“Let's get back to the hotel.” Alfred said still transfixed. He dropped his hand from Arthur neck to hold the omega’s hand.

“What about Natalya and the others?” Arthur asked.

Alfred in his revelation almost forgot about the others.

“Don’t worry about it." Alfred said pulling Arthur down the empty street towards the hotel. "They know how to get back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all will forgive the lateness of my updates. I promise I'm still alive just needed to focus on some RL stuff. Thanks for reading!


	20. Chapter 20

"Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes  
Tell myself it's time now, gotta let go  
But moving on from him is impossible  
When I still see it all in my head  
Burning red"

\- Taylor Swift "Red"

 

The moon was full and it's bright light was reflected on the gentle ocean waves. The sound of water calmed Arthur’s racing thoughts. He was leaning against the deck railing watching the waves move back and forth, moonlight dancing in the ripples.

The night’s events left the omega too agitated to sleep. His treacherous thoughts kept returning to Alfred and what would have happened if he didn’t stop the strange alpha’s advances. After they got back from the club, Alfred awkwardly dropped Arthur off at his room before returning to the one he shared with Natalya. The alpha probably just wanted to make sure Arthur was okay, but the way things ended between them made it difficult for them to talk to each other. 

This trip was encouraged by his therapist to challenge himself, but Arthur also knew that he needed to see Alfred so that he could get over him. As much as it hurt the omega to see the American alpha with another, he was somewhat content that Alfred seemed to have found someone who made him happy. The fact that Alfred still cared enough to help him out made Arthur glad that they may still be friends. Even if it hurt his heart, Arthur just wasn’t the type of person to break someone's relationship just because he made a mistake.

However, as far as Alfred is concerned, they were romantically over.

“Can't sleep?”

A voice startled Arthur from his thoughts. He turned to face her.

Natalya stepped out from the darken interior of the hotel room and onto the deck. The omega was wearing Alfred's shirt and after a moment Arthur picked up the alpha’s potent scent all over her.

He scrunched his nose and turned away ignoring the sharp tug in his heart.

“Not with Francis’ snoring next to my room.” Arthur replied.

Natalya hummed in acknowledgment and moved beside Arthur to lean against the railing. Both omegas were silently staring at the moonlit ocean.

 _‘Why of all people is she here?’_ Arthur begrudgingly thought.

She raised her hand to pull a cigarette from behind her ear and lit it with a lighter, taking a long drag, holding the smoke in, before exhaling in a breath.

Arthur watched her from the corner of his eye.

“Alfred doesn't like smokers. He'll smell it on you the moment you’ll walk back in.”

Natalya snorted and tilted her head towards the Brit. She slowly took another drag and blew the smoke away with the wind.

“I don't care what Alfred thinks of me.”

Waving the smoke away Arthur stared at her in confusion. “Um...okay?” Then he narrowed his eyes at her. “You’re in a relationship together, don’t you have to care?”

Natalya flicked the ash away. “Nope.”

Arthur felt his irritation spark but tried to suppress it. “If you don’t care, then why are you with him?”

She snickered and looked back at the ocean. “Who knows... Maybe ‘cus it's fun? Something different. Something to do...”

His anger flared and Arthur let it boil in his body, stirring dormant emotions and instincts. “You’re toying with him.” He bit out.

She hummed her agreement making Arthur grit his teeth in irritation.

All sorts of images and scenarios passed in Arthur’s head in an instant. Alfred was too good for this bitch and even if it wasn’t with him, the alpha deserved better.

“You didn’t care for Alfred either,” the female omega casually stated. “Why were you with him?”

“I love Alfred.” Arthur hissed.

“Do you?” Her tone rose slightly as she eyed the fuming omega. “From what I heard you toyed with him practically as much as I am.”

 _‘Did Alfred actually tell her this or is she messing with me?’_ Arthur bit his tongue from lashing out at the older omega. _‘Maybe I wasn’t the best boyfriend but I wouldn’t just use him like this.’_

They started at each other in silence trying to read what the other was thinking. Eventually Arthur had to fold his arms defensively around him before replying.  

“What happened between Alfred and I is none of your business.” The Brit hissed.

Natalya looked back at Arthur her expression blank and unreadable. The cigarette still burning in her hand. “It’s cute watching you get all territorial. You’re almost like a mated omega instinctively defending your mate from the competition.”

She took another drag watching Arthur’s face turn red, his mouth gaping at the comparison.

“Still...a true mate wouldn’t walk away from their partner, let alone tolerate a new potential mate.”  

Arthur knew his face was red both from embarrassment and anger. Implying that he was acting like Alfred’s mate when he actually wasn’t even dating the alpha, told a lot about his character. Was she the only one that notices the longing looks Arthur thought he cleverly concealed or did the rest of his friends knew that Arthur was still very much in love with an alpha who was dating another? More importantly, did Alfred know and chose to ignore him?

Natalya snickered again and took one last drag of the smoke before tossing the butt onto the beach. “You’ll just think yourself in circles. Go get some rest Arthur.” She carefully said and walked back inside.

Arthur stayed on the deck till the first rays of the sun were seen on the horizon. Exhausted and cold Arthur watched the sunrise, remembering all the while how loved he felt being with Alfred and the realization that he'll never be able to feel the same way again with anyone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got delayed cuz I got too caught up listening to Taylor Swift "Red" album aha...


	21. Chapter 21

“I want to break up with you.” Alfred blurted out in one breath. He fidgeted with the sleeves of his shirt, but was determined to stand tall and look straight at her.

They were in Natalya’s dorm. The neat little apartment was shared with another omega, but upon Alfred’s entry Yekaterina made herself scarce.

Natalya continued flipping through a magazine without stopping.

“Is that so?” Her voice piqued with mild interest as she paused at a page showing ‘Who wore it best?’

Alfred walked in front of her pulling the magazine away. “Yes. And this is serious.” He stared down at her, mouth set in a frown.

She looked up and matched the alpha’s expression. Leaning back in her chair the omega considered the situation.

“Alright.” She eyed the American alpha critically. “What about all that stuff you said about being mates and having a future?”

Alfred cringed and sat in a chair opposite Natalya. “This is why it's serious…”

Seeing that Alfred isn’t going to lead the discussion Natalya decided to cut straight to the chase. “Do you go around promising to be a mate to all the omega's you date?” She raised her eyebrow at him.

“What!? No! Of course not!” Alfred rammed his brain for some form of explanation, but as always the right words never come when you need them.

“Then why did you say it of you didn't mean it?” The omega continued in her even tone without missing a beat.

Natalya was being way too calm about this and it was starting to get on Alfred's nerves. He started to fidget again with the corners of the magazine, rolling the pages back and forth until they all became slightly curved.

“I don't know.” He said after a moment. “I was just going with it...I guess…” He looked helplessly at her.

Natalya hummed in frustration and rolled her eyes. “Well, my family is expecting a mating after grad. What are you planning on telling them exactly?”

“That I-” Alfred started but Natalya cut him off. “In love with another.”

The alpha was startled into silence. He then looked down, guilt showing plainly on his face.

“I guess I couldn’t really hide it...could I?” Alfred eventually asked.

“You think I'm stupid? That I never noticed the way you looked at him?” Natalya calmly asked Alfred across the table. “The whole trip you practically followed Arthur’s every move.”

“If you knew, why were you playing along?” Alfred couldn't help the bitterness that slipped into his tone.

“Alfred,” she reached across and grasped his hand making the alpha look up at her. “Do you remember our first meeting?”

Alfred thought back on that memory. “Yeah. It was at the gym. I was there letting off steam after…” He had to swallow down that memory.

“It was right after your fight with Arthur.” Natalya finished and Alfred could only nod his head.

He did in fact remembered it well. Running on the treadmill to work out his anger after he and Arthur broke up. The machines lined a glass wall that looked over the swimming pool where Natalya was doing laps.

“I didn’t mean to creep on you like that, by the way.” Alfred muttered.

The omega snorted. “Please. I approached you. Remember?”

Alfred couldn’t hold her gaze and had to look away as she continued. “We started hanging out. You told me about the break up and didn’t want to rush into anything. I said that it was fine. Then the library incident happened and suddenly we were a thing.”

“You sure know how to tell a romantic story.” Alfred tried to lighten the mood but it didn’t quite reach his voice.

“It was never meant to be one.” Natalya replied. “You were helping me out. To get away from that one bad ex and it was a stroke of bad luck that Arthur walked through those doors that same day.”

Alfred really hated his luck sometimes. He remembered the pained look on the omega’s face. It killed him to walk past Arthur without even a word of explanation. That he didn’t just moved on.  That Natalya’s ex-girlfriend was at the library, and the female alpha just didn’t understand that their relationship was over. Hence why Alfred offered to re-draw boundaries with some good old fashioned ‘staking a claim on an omega’ thing.

“You were pretty shaken up for the rest of the day.” Natalya continued watching Alfred’s face with caution. “I knew then that it would never work out romantically between us, but for some reason you chose to push us in that direction and refused to see me for who I was. You essentially replaced me with Arthur.”

Alfred couldn't even deny that because he knew it was true.

“I'm sorry Nat.” Alfred’s eyes scanned the room lost in memories and emotions that filled his body and made his heart ache. “I didn't mean to hurt or imply things- To you. And- oh man...your family too... I'll apologize to them of course- I’ll call them now. You don’t have to worry Nat-” He was babbling he knew he was.

“Alfred.”

The American alpha fell silent.

“It’s okay.” She squeezed his hand reassuringly. “We both just fell into a relationship that didn’t have any merit. And...I have to admit. I wanted to see how far this game would go. My mother constantly nags me about finding a mate so...you ended up being a perfect excuse for her to stop pestering me. Sorry.” She cringed apologetically.  

A little shellshocked Alfred didn’t quite know what to say. So of course he went with the worst. “I’m sure you’ll meet your mate soon.”

Natalya snorted and let go of his hand leveling the alpha with her disapproving look. When Alfred opened and closed his mouth several times without saying anything she let out a frustrated sigh.

“Let me tell you something about me.” She started defensively and to the point. “I don't care about these traditional bonding. In fact, you're not the first alpha that promise me to be mates or were introduced to my family. It's stricter in Belarus. Most omegas are already mated in their first year of university. I look at my mom and I see how happy she is being a mother, but I can't help but think there more to life then just that. You are family oriented and that's fine. I just can't even imagine myself to be a mother right now.”

She raised her hand to pat Alfred’s cheek, a coy smile on her lips.

“So you see? In the end I would have refused to mate with you, and not because I don't like you, but we just simply want different things.”

Nataliya reached and pulled the magazine back from under Alfred's arm opening it and flipping back to where she left off.

Sitting and possessing the information that he probably alway knew but never thought too deeply about was giving Alfred a headache. He stated at Natalya flipping the pages eyes darting over movie stars and celebrities with sharp criticism.

“I think you'll make a good mother.” Alfred said without thinking.

“Probably...but not with you.”

“Ah right…” Alfred coughed this conversation was now giving him a migraine. “What are we going to tell your parents?” He asked.

“ _I'm_ going to tell them the same thing I always do.” She looked at him with a raised brow. “and _you’re_ going to go and get your mate back.”

Alfred laughed out loud unable to hold it back after this bewildering situation. He thought back to Arthur and how different these two omegas are.

“You think he still wants to be my mate?” He wistfully asked.

She snorted. “I think you guys were mated from the moment you looked at each other.”

Alfred laughed again, a lighter laugh that left a wide grin on his face stretching his cheeks until they hurt.

He stood up and leaned over to kiss her cheek.

“Thanks Nat! And I'm sorry too! This was the weirdest breakup I ever had, but I'm glad it ended like this.”

Natalya hummed in agreement. “Don't you have someplace to be?” She asked without looking up.

Alfred grinned and kissed her goodbye again before rushing to the door.

The omega finally looked up and watched him go. Brushing the unwanted tears from her eyes she fondly snorted at the fool.

“Should I call mom right now or let her plan the ceremony a few more weeks?”

Yekaterina was leaning against the door of her room and Natalya’s good mood vanished. Blinking the tears away she composed herself before turning to her half sister.

“Don’t. It'll keep her busy a few more weeks. Just enough time for me to leave.” She went back to the magazine.

“Ugh. You still didn't tell them about the acting thing, did you? They are going to kill you.” Yekaterina scolded her sibling.

Natalya only smiled in self-satisfaction eyeing the Hollywood actresses on the red carpet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> .....we are almost there.....the end is near...just bear with my slow updating schedule....I just started a full time job for which I have to get up at 5am....
> 
> On another note, Natalya was a complex character whose motives and personality that probably weren't fully revealed even in this chapter, but since this is a usuk fic I didn't want to over indulge in my interest in her character. Still it was fun to write her^^


	22. Chapter 22

“Arthur I love you. I know we ended badly but I want to try us again. I'll try harder this time I swear. There's no one else but you.”

“Ugh. It's like straight out of  _ Vampire Diaries _ .”

Alfred flushed red and turned to throw a book at Gilbert who easily dodged it.

“Fuck off Gilly, this is important.”

Alfred turned and stared back at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He’s been practicing for hours, wanting the apology/getting back together speech to be perfect.

Gilbert leaned against the door frame grinning at Alfred in the mirror.

“If it's so important why are you wasting time confessing your undying love to your reflection?”

Alfred turned and threw a toilet paper roll at the albino, this time hitting him. Gilbert stumbled back in surprise giving Alfred enough time to slam the bathroom door shut. Turning back to his reflection the alpha sighed. He really should go and just talk to Arthur, but the possibility of a second rejection was not something that he was ready for. 

On the other side of the door Alfred could hear Gilbert muttering about him and the annoying inconvenience that is Alfred’s love life and how the alpha should just act like one already.

Irritated Alfred yelled back loud enough for their neighbours to hear.

“For a ‘real’ alpha you sure know a whole lot about  _ Vampire Diaries _ Gilbert!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little extra scene that didn't quite fit with the previous or the next chapter. I also wrote it after binge watching Vampire Diaries last year....no regrets :P


	23. Chapter 23

If this was a fairy tale then Alfred would walk straight to Arthur’s dorm, both would apologize and confess their undying love for one another and live happily ever after.

But this was not a fairy tale.

The alpha was a little dazed after his break up with Natalya, and couldn't bring himself to see Arthur right away in fear of a second rejection. A full month filled with last minute assignments and study sessions went by, and before he knew it Alfred was handing in his final exam and packing up his dorm room with his parents. The boxes were hauled, the place cleaned spotless. Alfred moved back to his family house until he found a job and a place to live on his own.

A few more days after the finals week, he was sitting among the graduates waiting for his row to stand up and walk across the stage to shake the hands of the school’s big shots and receive his degree.

The hats were thrown. The streamers released. Everyone laughed with joy and hugged each other.

But as Alfred’s eyes darted across the smiling faces of graduates and their families he realized that he missed his chance.

He would move and Arthur would be here for another year.

What if they never meet up again? Very rarely did people actually keep in contact with their old classmates or friends from school. Even worse, he never even talked with Arthur to try and mend things between them.

What if that time over spring break was the last?

* * *

 

Arthur was impatiently jerking his right leg as their car slowly crawled through downtown traffic. Outside there were students in black gowns accompanied by their families slowly walking towards the auditorium in the city center.

The omega glanced at the clock and huffed in annoyance. They were 10 minutes late.

“Don’t worry, Arthur, we’ll make it.” His father grumbled in his low voice.

“But what if I miss them?” Arthur complained.

“You won’t.” His father simply said and that was that.

Arthur wanted to believe him, but scenarios of everything going wrong played over and over in his mind. Their lateness didn't help Arthur to relax either, because if he missed the meet up now he won’t be able to get in and will have to wait even longer. He really shouldn’t have put this off till the last minute.

Finally, after another 10 minutes they pulled to the corner and Arthur spotted Annabelle and Lee Jones, but Alfred was not with them and Arthur felt a sense of dread spread in his stomach.

“Looks like Alfred already left.” His father stated the obvious and Arthur became slightly light headed. “Do you want to go back?” The alpha asked his son.

It would be smarted to come back after all of this was over and just talk to Alfred at his house, but Arthur didn’t know if he could wait that long. After his encounter with Natalya, Arthur was restless. She called them 'true mates' and that thought plagued Arthur’s waking and sleeping hours. He kept thinking on their past, all the time they spend together, and how it all ended. The break up especially was the hardest to come to terms with. If only they were able to resolve that argument in another way. If only Arthur had the courage to explain to Alfred that he didn’t want the alpha to stay for his heat, not because he didn't love or want him, but because Arthur was afraid that it might trigger Alfred’s rut. An alpha in a rut would be unable to comprehend Arthur's distress simply pinning him down and taking him.

Arthur already knew that Alfred has a hard time controlling his instincts outside of heat, and it should be a clear indication that the alpha wasn't right for him. However, if that was true, then why was he so affected by Alfred leaving him?

Natalya clearly saw something that Arthur missed. If they were indeed true mates, then Arthur was willing to risk everything to find out instead of spending his entire life wondering at the mere possibility.

“No, I’ll just go with them.” Arthur said resolutely although his hands were shaking as he unbuckled the seatbelt. “I’ll call you when I’m done.” The omega said and stepped out of the car.

The noise of the city and the crowd disoriented Arthur for a second, but he focussed on walking straight to the Jones.

“Arthur!” Annabelle waves excitedly prompting Arthur to weakly wave back. Once he was close she hugged him unintentionally startling the omega.

“Ah...sorry sweetie.” Letting him go Annabelle combed his messy hair back. “You just missed him, but I got an extra guest pass if you want to come with us.”

Arthur thought again on going home and not dealing with this, but if he can’t put his fears aside for Alfred how was he expecting the alpha to do the same?

“No I’ll come.”

Which was a decision he almost immediately regretted when he had to endure being herded along with the rest of the attendees into the building. Being squeezed on the stairway was the worst and Arthur had to force himself to keep breathing and move his legs lest he fall and get trampled. Of course the Jones tried their best to help him but obviously they didn’t know exactly what to do. Arthur was almost in tears by the time they were seated smack down in the middle of the row. Annabelle was to his right while an alpha stranger was on Arthur’s left and every now and again unintentionally elbowed Arthur. He was trapped and couldn’t leave. The auditorium was packed full of people and despite knowing that there was plenty of air Arthur started to inhale in short rapid breaths that made him lightheaded and on a verge of a panic attack.

Annabelle grasped his hand. “Try to take deep, slow breaths Arthur.” She urged.

He nodded trying to heed her advice.

The ceremony began with customary speeches from people most likely none of the graduates or their guests knew, but applauded anyways. The standard praise of the university and the graduates, the challenges, and hopes for the future, references to past events and people all lasted an eternity to Arthur. He tried to look for Alfred but the sea of black caps and gowns all looked the same so the omega had to be content at looking at the clock and watch its second hand slowly go around the circumference. Finally after many more applause and elbowing from the alpha next to him, all of which Arthur barely tolerated, the actual walk begun. Arthur's relief was short lived as he realized that each department would have to be called, extending the ceremony to another hour. The building with so many people inside was starting to heat up, making Arthur sweat and difficult to breath in the stuffy air. Arthur swore that he wouldn’t attend his own graduation. This was more than enough.

Somewhere between the excited chatter, camera flashes, and frantic applause Arthur finally heard the name he was looking for and Annabelle cheered loudly while Lee stood up to applaud. Arthur’s eyes were glued to the man walking across the stage followed his every move afraid to loose sight of him. The alpha turned and waved in a general direction before he walked off the stage and was led to another part of the auditorium. He would have to stay there until everyone was done.

Arthur’s heart pounded and adrenaline suddenly kicked in. The omega knew there and then that he just had to get to Alfred, whatever it took. His instincts fueled by the adrenaline urged him to run to the alpha. He simply couldn't be here any longer without Alfred's scent reassuring and comforting him or else Arthur will simply go mad.

Memorizing where Alfred was seated Arthur stood up and hurriedly stumbled past the seated people. His body was shaking from stress and the omega felt too hot. His mind blank, knowing only that the alpha was here and that Arthur needed to be close to him. Awkwardly muttering apologies and tripping over numerous feet he finally made it out of the aisle. The omega frantically tried to find the stairs in the large building ignoring everyone that tried to grab his attention focusing only on the one goal that his instincts were dictating. He was halfway down the stairs when the deafening yells and applause reverberated throughout the building signaling the end of the ceremony.

When Arthur finally reached the main entrance to the lower floor he was met with chaos and confusion of the celebrating graduates. Swallowing his nerves Arthur ran into the chaos to where he last saw Alfred.

Pushing through the crowd was horrible. Even worse, Arthur wasn’t sure if he was even going in the right way. He tripped and collided into people that yelled and glared at the terrified omega, but it was too late to turn back now. Somehow through the streamers and caps Arthur saw him.

“Al! Alfred!” He reached out trying to get through the crowd. The rush of adrenaline that got him here suddenly passes and turned into fear. Arthur sank down to the floor choking on air that he tried to suck into his mouth. Just before he crashed to the floor a hand reached out and grabbed his arm, pulling the petrified omega through the cluster of people.

Arthur was sobbing in Alfred's arms pressing into the alpha’s neck moments later.

“Shhh...It's okay. I got cha.” Alfred rubbed his hand up and down the omega’s back. “Come on. Let's move to the side. Okay?”

Arthur frantically nodded against the alpha’s neck and allowed Alfred to lead him.

They push through the masses, loud voices in the auditorium mixed with streamers and balloons still falling from the ceiling tangling in everything. The place was jam-packed and vibrated with uncontrolled excitement making Alfred’s head spin as he slowly navigated them through the chaos. Glancing down at Arthur, who kept his head bowed, Alfred wondered how the omega made it here in the first place. Tightening his grip on Arthur the alpha finally spotted a somewhat clear space and pushed them forward. They settled behind a row of tables as far away from everyone as possible. Alfred carefully hugged Arthur not too tightly but keeping him pressed against the wall and away from the frenzy of the celebration.

Arthur, however, was restless. He’s crying and nuzzling into Alfred’s neck holding the alpha tightly as if he’s afraid that Alfred will disappear. The chaos of the auditorium exists in a far away place in his mind as he fully immerses his senses in Alfred’s scent and slowly feels his instincts calm down.

“I’m sorry Al.” Hiccup. “I’m so sorry.” The omega was crying while Alfred’s heart was breaking.

“No shhh. I’m sorry too Artie. Please don’t cry.” But Alfred’s own voice breaks and he gives in.

He tightens his hold on the omega and nuzzles into Arthur's hair inhaling the omega’s scent. It’s just as sweet as he remembers and Alfred realizes how much he actually missed it. The alpha allows himself to forget everything and just be here with Arthur sharing this closeness.

The omega’s breath deepens as he fights to stay calm against the claustrophobia. Arthur closes his eyes and reminds himself that Alfred won’t intentionally hurt him. That being in the alpha’s embrace was the safest he ever felt. Slowly he calms down and presses closer to Alfred, letting the anxiety be, lingering on the edges of the relief he feels.

They remained wrapped in an embrace for a long time before they are forced apart and ushered out by the event coordinators to slowly make their way out of the building. Unwilling to let Arthur go, Alfred keeps the omega in front of him, trying to make as much room for Arthur as he can with his larger built to prevent other people from pressing up against the omega and pushing the shorter man around. Arthur tightly clenched Alfred’s hands and focuses on walking trusting Alfred to help him stay calm. There’s only one exit that everyone has to squeeze through and after a particularly uncomfortable sensation of almost suffocating they make it out.

The sun momentarily blinds Arthur with it’s brightness after hours of being inside, but the omega doesn’t get a chance to recover when Alfred immediately pulls them down the street away from the excitement. They walk four blocks away from where the graduates meet their families and stop for numerous pictures or to chat with their friends.

Alfred’s hand is damp with sweat and he wants to tear the black synthetic gown off of him, but getting Arthur to a quiet place is his first priority. Then he needs to calm the British boy, and maybe even find someplace to eat since all that excitement would have left him drained, and then...He doesn’t even registered Arthur’s voice until the omega stops and their hands break their hold.

“Alfred!”

Alfred turns wide eyed, the sun burning on his back.

“What?”

Arthur’s face was flushed and eyes red from crying, but the look in them startled the alpha.

Arthur was panting, trying to stop his mind from racing. When he came for the graduation ceremony he knew that it wouldn't be easy for him but he was prepared. Still, four hours of sitting on the bleachers through the ceremony then actually running towards Alfred, left the omega mentally and physically exhausted. His mind was a mess. It was frustrating. He waited weeks for this moment planning it down word for word, rehearsing his speech even, but it never goes the way you plan a moment.

Arthur doesn’t realizes that he’s crying again until Alfred’s hands are wiping away the tears. He can feel the alpha’s body heat and wants to be surrounded in that warmth. Without much thought the omega wraps his arms around the alpha’s torso sobbing into his chest.

Alfred tries his best to soothe the omega but his own tears start to sting in his eyes.

“Arthur I-” Here the alpha stumbled over his words unsure what he was supposed to say. Should he to declare his love? Or ask Arthur how he got here? Or say that he was an idiot for letting the omega go.

Arthur shakes his head and chokes out the words that settle all the doubt in Alfred’s mind.

“I- I love you!” He’s sniffling and tries to calm his crying to get the next part out. “I- don’t want you to leave me...I-”

Alfred kisses Arthur interrupting him. His lips press against Arthur’s who presses back eagerly. The alpha gently runs his fingers over the omega’s neck and Arthur melt against him. He opens his mouth allowing the alpha to push his tongue inside. There’s a few loud whistles but neither of them heard it. When Alfred feels Arthur gently push away he allows the kiss to break and pulls back resting their foreheads together.

“I love you too, Arthur.” He whispers and let the words hang between them. It's amazing how liberating it is to say the truth out loud. To not have to second guess your feelings or suppress them.

Arthur laughs with joy and pulls Alfred back into another kiss. Alfred’s alpha instincts and senses are fired up as his system recognizes the omega. Slowly their pheromones mix with each other becoming attuned once again. He’s lightheaded and giddy with joy, and his body is practically pulling towards Arthur becoming hyperaware of every place where they are touching. Pulling apart again Alfred’s can’t help himself but nuzzle the omega’s hair scenting Arthur. It practically overwhelms him how much love and happiness Arthur’s scent carries but also a small portion of anxiety and fear, that Alfred want to remedy as soon as possible. Arthur was also pressing into his neck scenting Alfred, his hands wandering over the alpha’s broad back as the omega pressed closer.

‘This must be what having a true mate feels like.’

Arthur’s laugh is filled with wonder and relief. “I think so, yeah.”

Alfred’s face turned red. “Ahh...I said it out loud didn’t I?”

Arthur grinned against the alpha’s neck and boldly darted his tongue out. “Yes, you did.” He looked up with warm green eyes that glowed with love and Alfred wants to spend the rest of his life staring into them.

An obnoxious ringing of Alfred’s cell phone jolted the pair apart. The alpha fished out the phone from his pants in a hurry, muttering ‘sorry’ to Arthur, who looked a little embarrassed as he finally realized they were making out in the middle of the street.

Alfred answered the call only to almost drop it in surprise as his mother’s voice yelled on the other end.

“Alfred F. Jones! Where are you?!” She sounded frantic.

“Ahh….sorry mom…” He completely forgot about meeting his parent. “I’m with Arthur.”

She sighed in relief “Oh good! I was worried we lost him. Is he okay?”

A grin stretched across Alfred’s lips as he eyed Arthur’s red face with satisfaction. The alpha extended his hand to Arthur. “Yeah he’s fine, just a little ruffled up.”

Alfred’s grin widened as Arthur’s face became even redder but the omega reached out to grab the alpha’s hand without hesitation. They intertwining their fingers together and beamed at each other with pure joy not caring for the world around them. Alfred squeezed their hands together, rubbing his thumb over Arthur’s.

 _‘There's really no one else.’_ Alfred thought.

Arthur came here. For both of them. To try and fix everything between them knowing full well that it was outside of the omega’s comfort zone, but despite all that, Arthur came to him and Alfred was not going to let him go a second time.

A thought started to formulate in his mind and the more Alfred thought about it, the more he wanted to share his life with Arthur.

Squeezing Arthur's hand Alfred flushed red before speaking, his voice shaking from nerves.

“We’ll meet up with you guys soon. There’s...something I need to ask Arthur...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has to be the most sappy ending I have written....well I guess after all that angst they deserve it. Just have the epilogue left and this story will be completed ^^
> 
> Also AO3 wouldn't let me post this chapter :/ kept having to reload and re-edit this like five time...


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The long awaited epilogue.

“Arthur. You need to say it clearly.”

Kiku calmly stated.

Alfred gently ran his fingers over Arthur's neck, sending a pleasant tingling feeling down the omega’s back.

It's been three years.

Arthur mused in contemplation at how much his life changed in seemingly so little time. 

Graduating from university. Getting back together with Alfred. Working through his phobia. But perhaps moving to San Francisco was one of the more drastic changes. Alfred wasted little time in applying to various tech jobs across the country. When the alpha eventually got an offer in San Francisco, he couldn’t refuse the opportunity.

With Alfred moving to the west coast, Arthur was left with the dilemma of either staying close to his parents or following his mate across the country. A decision that left his parents immediately worried and try to sway his decision into staying close to home. But Arthur couldn’t leave Alfred. Not again. They agreed that Alfred would fly out first to set up and start working, while Arthur stayed to mentally prepared himself for the move. Since this would be Arthur's first airplane trip he took small steps with the help of his therapist and Francis to overcome this challenge. Over the course of six months Arthur took small day trips close to home with his family and friends to get used to the discomforts that came with travel. It was a good opportunity to spend some time with the family before leaving them for his new life. By the time the date of his departure came, Arthur was finally ready for the big leap. As Arthur watched his teary eyed parents wave at him across the security barriers it finally registered in his mind that this was really happening. His luggage checked in and carry on bag in hand Arthur took a deep breath and briskly walked to his gate nerves steeled.

The airplane ride was the worst, as Arthur knew it would be, but he somehow managed to endure the almost six hour plane ride. Working through his breathing exercises and looking out of the window somehow helped to keep the worst of it at bay. However, there was little to be done for the stiffness in his neck and back that came with cramped and uncomfortable seating. Arthur literally broke out in tears once he was out of the metal tin can and saw Alfred greeting him holding a sign with his name surrounded by cutout paper hearts.

The cab ride to their apartment was anything but pg13, try as Arthur did to keep his alpha's hands over his shirt. It wasn't till day three that the omega actually got to explore his new house let alone the neighbourhood. And after that? Well...Surprisingly, Arthur adapted fairly quickly to the new place. Maybe it was the fog and the cooler weather, or the possibility of adopting a dog, but moving across the country away from everything he knew wasn’t what ended up burdening the omega.

Alfred moved his hand from the Arthur’s neck to grasp his mate's hand in support. 

Arthur cleared his throat. “Right.” He interlaced their fingers. Gathering his courage the omega turned and looked at his alpha. 

Alfred tentatively smiled at Arthur, silently encouraging him.

“I'm scared of you knotting me.” Arthur quickly muttered and dropped his gaze losing nerve.

His heart pounded in his chest, anxiety gathering in his stomach making him nauseous.

“Go on.” Kiku gently prompted and Alfred squeezed their hands tighter as if he was afraid of letting go. 

Arthur chewed on his lip anxiously as the feeling of shame as to why there where here twisted his stomach.

“I'm terrified that you'll lose control and…” Arthur swallowed feeling his throat going dry. “...and pin me down...”

His heart ached with pain at the admission. Glancing up at the alpha, Arthur’s whole body shook with shame and guilt at the pain on his mate's face.

Three full years and Arthur still couldn't allow Alfred to be with him during his heat.

It hurt the alpha, Arthur knew that it did, despite Alfred  reassuring the omega  that he would wait for as long as Arthur wanted. Each month he would leave Arthur to go through the heat alone despite clearly wanting to stay. Wanting Arthur to trust Alfred to take care of him, but each time Arthur would shut him out and Alfred didn't know what to do to get through to his mate. So he left. 

Every month it was the worst week for them both.

“We should go to your therapist together.” Alfred blurted out one morning after returning from his cousin’s house where he spent the week away from Arthur.

Arthur stopped mid pour of coffee to gawk at his mate, still half asleep and miserable from an unfulfilled heat.  _ ‘No.’ _ He instantly thought and Alfred most likely saw it on his face and immediately gave up, confidence lost.

The omega bit his lip and finished pouring the coffee. He handed it to Alfred before taking a moment to think about it. Three years. How did it get so long? It was really unfair to both of them. He poured another cup of coffee for himself and took a slow sip before turning to his mate.

“Alright. I'll book it today.”

Arthur quickly discovered that it wouldn't be their only appointment. The omega couldn't voice all his doubts and worries to Alfred right off the bat. It was easier to shift through all his worries in his head, but when he was suddenly placed on the spot Arthur just shut down. 

Alfred in turn had difficulties opening up and talk about the less pleasant parts of their relationship. Mainly how he felt like a nagging parent instead of a partner in an equal relationship. Constantly worrying for Arthur  when the omega shut him out  and repressing his base alpha needs left him uncertain and miserable. 

It was nerve-wracking when they silently ate their dinner after a tense discussion, or worse, when neither of them wanted to say anything at all. Despite Kiku’s prompts, the mated pair just stared into space waiting for their time to end.

Too many times after their therapy session Arthur came home and thought the end was coming. That one of them just wouldn't be able to handle the strain and leave. Just like last time. 

Of course it wasn't always that bad, but it wasn't all that easy and pleasant either.

At the end of every visit Kiku gently reassured them that they were on the right path, but it was difficult to believe that when your mate, turned away from you, was faking sleep and you not knowing how to break through the barrier also shut them out.

“How…” Arthur swallowed around the lump in his throat taking a moment to think about the phrasing of his fears. “How can I be sure that-... that you can control yourself? I mean. When you're in a rut?” 

“Artie…” Alfred's hand tightened around Arthur's.

The omega’s hand started to hurt but he was afraid of pulling it away.

“You know I would never intentionally hurt you...right?”

Arthur nodded but the dread was already brewing in his stomach. “I'm a horrible mate.” The omega quietly bit out.

“No. You're not.” Alfred firmly stated drawing Arthur's eyes up to his mate’s face. “If anything….” Alfred's body tensed and his scent turned sour. “I'm the terrible one…” 

Arthur couldn't help but reach and cradle his mates face in his hands leaning in and gently kissing him.

Alfred broke their kiss and nuzzled into his mates hair. “I'm suppose to care and protect you…” He muttered inhaling Arthur's scent which grounded the alpha. “But. You're scared. And even off heat, you're never really relaxed. Never fully enjoying it. Us.” Alfred nuzzled down to Arthur’s neck. “What kind of alpha am I if I can't give you what you need?”

Arthur’s nerves were hyper aware of Alfred's breath on his neck where a mating mark should have been. His arms wrapped around the alpha's torso, gripping the back of his shirt. 

“You are a wonderful mate Alfred.” Arthur quietly said his heart beating fast in his chest. “You waited for me to finish school. And...and put up with all my bullshit...and...despite all that you love me. I- I love you too. I'm terrified you'll leave cus’ I'm… I ...can't …”

Alfred was shushing and petting his hair as Arthur slowly realized that he was crying. He flushed red in embarrassment, but couldn't quite stops the tears. Kiku passed a box of tissues which Alfred grabbed and offered to Arthur. When the omega somewhat got his emotions under control he quickly apologized. 

“No need.” Kiku waved it off. “It's good and healthy to fully express how you feel. If you need to cry then cry.”

Arthur nodded but still couldn't look up at the beta in embarrassment. “My heat will be here in a week.” He  awkwardly  stated.

“Exactly.” The beta said jotting down in his notes. “So? What are you to going to do?”

The couple looked at each other in uncertainty. After a moment of silence Kiku flipped through his notepad.

“Let’s see. The two of you been making a lot of progress since both of you started to come in. Today I would say was the best session yet. Voicing your fears and expressing all that you appreciate about each other are all good things that will strengthen and empower your relationship. Arthur,” Kiku turned his gaze to the omega. “I would encourage you to challenge yourself like you did in college. Your heats will only get worse the more time passes. It would be easier if you didn't have a mate, but you body knows that Alfred should be with you during that time. You are putting yourself through unnecessary stress by denying yourself.”

Arthur sagged against the couch shifting towards Alfred for comfort. He suddenly felt drained of all energy.

“If you're forcing me to…” The omega weakly started but couldn't finish his sentence with Alfred tensing up beside him. 

“No one is forcing you Arthur.” Kiku patiently replied. “It is simply a suggestion as well as information of what to expect if you don't allow yourself to overcome this.”

Alfred reached to run his fingers over Arthur's neck. He turned to the beta.

“Is there a chance that I could hurt him without realizing?” The alpha asked.

Kiku glanced through his notes again before answering.

“There's always a chance of injury during heats, but that goes for all types. There is no ‘normal’ in a heat as it varies across people. But.” Kiku raised his hand in a ‘wait’ gesture when he saw Arthur about to argue and Alfred’s frown at the vague answer.

“Overtime both partners will become tuned to one another. Even in the midst of wildest heats you will be able to sense each other's discomfort and over time the intensity will slowly ebb away and you will both be close to rational.”

Alfred still has a frown. “So there's no guarantee.”

“Of course not. Trust and stability in a relationship is built over time.”

Arthur sighed in frustration. He’s been hearing those words since  university  when he was going to his prior therapist on the east coast. “I think we are done for today.”

* * *

 

 

The omega was pulling his nest bedding from the closet. He stumbled through the hallway to the bedroom dropping a blanket along the way 

Not bothering to pick it up Arthur continued on into the bedroom, dropping the bedding onto the mattress. It was bare of their regular sheets, instead Arthur pulled the special thick blanket over the top so all the fluids wouldn't seep through. Then he stretched the fitted cotton sheet over the blanket. Multiple size pillows were arranged around the bed and a few neatly folded smaller blankets were stacked at the foot of the bed within reach if needed. 

“You dropped this.”

Arthur turned and saw Alfred holding a blanket that Annabelle secretly gifted him. He walked to his mate, a fond smile on his lips, as Arthur gabbed it. “Thanks.” They stood there looking silently at each other both holding one corner of the bonding blanket. Despite not having a mating mark this was Arthur’s proof that he was part of Alfred’s family. That he was wanted, and accepted, and loved. Arthur pulled the blanket into his arms and silently walked back to spread it over the nest.

Looking over his handy work Arthur mentally checked off if all the things he will need are here. 

Constructed nest? Check.

Non-perishable food, snacks, and water? Check.

Nothing obstructing the skylights? Check.

Toys? Check.

Alpha? 

The man in question made his way over to the omega and wrapped his arms loosely around Arthur’s hips nuzzling into the back of his neck.

Check.

“I can still leave.” Alfred offered but his tone implied that he really wouldn't want to.

And despite the lingering unease neither would Arthur actually. 

All week the pair spend planning for today. Having the alpha there helping with the preparations settled Arthur’s nerves and invoked the most domestic sensation in him prior to which he never experienced. 

A sort of calm haze settled over the omega as he watched his mate stock the mini fridge with water and snacks, or help bring out the sheets to wash before they would be used in the nest. Climbing on the roof to make sure the skylights were clean. And all the while scenting Arthur. It wasn't so much erotic as endearing. Having someone fret over him wasn't something that Arthur wanted in general, but when Alfred did it in this particular situation, somehow it was okay. Great even. 

Of course they also agonized over all the things that could go wrong. Arthur considered their sex life to be fine, but the alpha was right, Arthur never fully relaxed and gave in to the feeling. Always controlled. They tried to find ways to prevent   Alfred's rut,  but nothing really came to mind. If Arthur's heat was too potent the alpha’s rut would be that much harder to control. 

“It'll be fine.” Alfred muttered into Arthur's neck darting his tongue out to lick and suck a hickey.

Already their pheromones were getting stronger , slowly filling the room.

Arthur did a final mental check as Alfred's hands were moving down his body sending shivers down his spine.

“Yeah...it’ll be fine…” Arthur replied as his world went black.

* * *

 

The panic crept up unexpectedly. 

One moment Arthur was floating in a haze of ecstasy and euphoria, and the next he was choking on air trying to get away from under a big weight that was crushing him. 

It was dark and disorienting. His throat was parched like he was screaming for hours. Clawing at the sheets Arthur jerked around making the weight at his back press him further into the mattress.

Feeling helpless Arthur started to whine. 

The weight shifted and lifted. Arthur felt his body being dragged backwards. He tried to get away but his body felt like jelly and refused to cooperate. It was as if all the energy had left him and all the omega could do was lean back against Alfred. 

Alfred. 

_ ‘That's right. It's just Alfred.’ _ His thoughts seemed to reorganize themselves and slowly Arthur started to recognize other feelings and sensations.

His body was sore, tired, and drenched in sweat. Muscles Arthur didn’t even know he had were screaming from strain. Seeing the bright glow of the digital clock took Arthur’s brain several more minutes of watching the numbers change before he was able to understand that it said five o’clock. Glancing up the omega saw the the dim glow of the new day coming in through the skylights. Or maybe it was evening?

Panic started again, but this time Alfred’s hushed voice filled his brain. The alpha's large hands rubbed circles into his belly as he muttered seemingly unintelligible things into his ear.

It would have been soothing if Arthur didn't try to roll over only to painfully hiss as the movement brought intense pain to his nether regions. 

“Stay still Artie.” 

The command stuck and Arthur didn't try to pull away. 

He was trapped. Unable to escape or move. The panic swirled on the edges, Arthur's heart increased its rate and he started to sweat.

“Shhh. You're okay. Let's breathe slowly together. Okay?”

Arthur just nodded his agreement. Anything to get rid of this bubbling fear.

With Alfred laying on his back and Arthur sprawled directly over the alpha, the omega was able to feel each rise and fall of Alfred's chest beneath him. 

The sky outside  gradually became brighter. _ ‘So morning then.’ _ Arthur silently watched the outside world light up with Alfred's slow breath marking the passage of time.

He must have dozed off, since the next major movement startled him awake. 

“Sorry.” Alfred said as he pulled out of Arthur making the omega hiss at the loss.

Alfred maneuvered them around onto their sides before crawling away toward the fridge.

Arthur felt wetness leak out of him and he whined kicking the blankets away.

_ ‘It's the heat.’ _ He remembered. ‘It shouldn't start so soon again.’ 

“Probably cus’ I marked you. Here.” Alfred propped Arthur up and tilted an open water bottle against Arthur’s lips. 

The cold liquid was divine and Arthur wanted to drown in it. 

“Easy. Don't choke.” Alfred lightly chided taking the bottle away. “Better?”

“Yes,” Arthur replied barely recognizing his own voice. “Thanks.”

“Of course.” Alfred gulped the remaining of the water before throwing the empty bottle away across the room. “Lay down now, yeah? Let me check you over.”

“What happened?” Arthur asked as he allowed Alfred to move them into their usual position on the side.

A sudden moan broke through sending all of Arthur's nerve ending on fire as Alfred inserted his fingers inside the omega.

“Sorry.” Alfred said, although judging by the satisfied grin Arthur doubted that the alpha was anything but.

His outer walls tightened around the alpha’s fingers as they moved and spread open inside the omega’s wet hole rubbing against the sore walls. 

“Are you trying to rile me up?” Arthur felt his cock begin to rise.

“No just making sure nothing was hurt. You were thrashing pretty hard when I tied with you.” Alfred removed his fingers and leaned on his hand to look over his omega. “I had to bite you to keep you from hurting us both. Sorry.” Alfred frowned.

Arthur placed his palm over his neck and sure enough Alfred's teeth marks were there in neat little rows. 

“I know you wanted to wait till the end of the heat, but I only knew the bite would calm you. Guess I was pretty deep in my rut that I couldn't think of anything else. Sorry.” Alfred traced his fingers over Arthur’s forehead.

Arthur turned on his back and reached for his alpha. “No, no it’s fine. It doesn't matter.”

“Really?” Alfred grasped the omega’s hand and nuzzled into the warm palm. 

After a moment he leaned down on the pillow facing Arthur. The morning light started to shine through and the birds were beginning to chirp, but in their nest it was still cozy enough to speak in whispers.

Alfred carded his fingers through Arthur's hair moving closer to lightly kiss his mate.  Pulling back Alfred looked over Arthur's tired face. The omega's green eyes were trying hard to stay open but it was a losing battle.  Alfred traced his fingers down to gently rub over the bite mark. 

“You know...I don't need to dominate you, I just need you to trust me.” He quietly whispered. 

Arthur eyes blinked wide awake. He stared at Alfred and after a while the omega shifted fully into Alfred's arms intertwining their legs and arms, fully pressing himself against Alfred's warm body.

“Arthur?” 

The alpha could smell the anxiety on him, Arthur knew that. He could never hide it nor fully get rid of his claustrophobia even when wrapped in Alfred’s arms despite knowing that he was safe and Alfred would let him go at any time Arthur wanted.

Arthur pressed closer and urged Alfred to embrace him. They stayed like this, Arthur working through the feeling of entrapment, familiarizing himself with all the sensations that he feels. Alfred's heart beating in time with his own as the alpha’s hands ran over his back. 

“I trust you. Always.” Arthur finally replies. “But you have to give me time. Like...just now. I'm okay like this...I like this.”

Arthur pulled back to smile sleepily at Alfred. “Is this okay?”

A wide smile stretched over Alfred’s lips as he looked at Arthur with adoration and love.

“Of course sweet heart. Anything you need.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long...I'm not sure why that happened but I hope the length of the chapter made up for the long wait! (Ahh sorry to those who were hoping for porn...it just didn't work out to be fully explicit...)
> 
> With this chapter this story is officially completed thank you for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos!


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